I sat on the start line with the din of howling racing engines battering my ears, and a fog of two-stroke smoke hanging in the air, thinking: "What the hell have I done? I don't belong here! I am a soulful adventure rider who casts off from society and rides long and far to escape, to cut loose, in search of open vistas and starry skies. What am I doing with this bunch of mad petrol heads???"
But I looked down and I was wrapped in protective plastic, sitting on a tiny angry wasp of a plastic motorcycle - and I was actually adding to the cacophony. Am I one of them?
There wasn't much time to think about what I was doing, or what was going to happen, because we were off. My game plan was simple - stay out of everyone's way, drift to the back of the field and coast around checking out this crazy scene.
I sort of did that, but then we got to this first really steep hill, and I was cruising up it serenely and then some fool (haha) crashed half way up and fell right in front of me and knocked me over. And it was so loose there was no getting going again on the hill, and by the time I was back on track I was bringing up the rear or just about. So, the next fifteen kays or so passed in relative solitude, which suited me - I was getting the hang of the bike, which I'd only ridden briefly once, and finding out how to deal with a two-stroke power band and the almost complete absence of torque.
Eventually I came across this huge hill (it had a name, but I can't for the life of me remember it), and saw about twenty bikes littered across its slopes. It looked like a mini-Erzberg scene, and I joined the two guys waiting at the bottom for the carnage to clear so we could have a run at it. Eventually one of them said he's going, and somehow he found a line through the chaos and made it up. The other guy had already had a crack and failed, so it was my turn and I took a deep breath.
That little KDX - vintage off road race bike though she may be - is a mountain goat. We blasted up the hill no problem, and got a bunch of places back into the bargain. The rest of the lap passed without incident (apart from a tiny sideways somersault in the riverbed ravine) - Lap 1: done!
This is quite easy, I thought. I can do this. So I passed my pits - well, actually I hadn't managed to find them before the race - ate a quick energy bar and cruised on. Oh, I forgot to mention - I somewhat shamefully got lapped before the end of lap 1!
Lap 2 passed pretty much without incident. Cruised easily up the steep hills, and had picked up a bit of pace over the first lap, but then had a wipeout from a pure lack of concentration going down the steep hill to the ravine section. Scooterbike/Dirk from this forum was marshalling and he was behind me at this point. I was battling a bit at the beginning of the ravine section and he yelled at me that I needed to put my kickstand up. I kicked. It fell down. I kicked. It fell down. Damn spring had disappeared - probably in my last off. I yelled for cable ties (note to self for next race) but he had none - ever the helpful marshall, however, he returned with some red and white barrier tape and threw it down to me in the gorge. I tied up and finished lap 2, luckily bumping into my pit as I did. I ran to the car for petrol and cable ties, and gave my ride a bit of TLC.
Somewhat ominously, as I started Lap 3 I felt the twinges of cramp setting in. I was a bit surprised, as I wasn't feeling that tired. But apparently my body felt differently. About five kays in I stopped to re-attach a strap on my chest protector - a lovely bit of fancy new Leatt kit that makes you feel invincible - and got lapped by a few more bikes. Cruising on it became clear I was about to start a cramp fest of note. I started riding like a granny, mostly because just about every muscle in my body that was needed to control the bike was going into revolt. But I was having fun anyway, in a slow motion kind of way.
A newbie should always get a bit of a slap when having the cheek to do something they are completely unqualified for. At the bottom of the riverbed ravine was a huge bundle of old barbed wire that I'd passed twice already. This time, I somehow managed to pick it up with my fat knobblies, and wrap the entire thing around my wheel, chain and swingarm. I lent the bike down against the sand and pondered my predicament. I was going nowhere! Like an uneducated idiot I'd brought no tools of any description. But luckily some kind samaritan stopped and gave me a leatherman. I took about twenty minutes to cut the damn stuff off - alternately jumping out of the track and getting roosted by the fast guys coming past, but eventually my bike was free. Honestly, I'd probably been glad for the break.
I got back on and limped to the finish, delighted to see the chequered flag, as there was no way I'd have made another lap. I'd discovered that one can cramp in one's shoulder, under one's ribs, and even in one's appendix. And I don't have an appendix. I've just had a recovery nap at home, and I'm still cramping!
So, summary of the day? It's a strange world out there in the off-road motorsports fraternity. But I'm going to be an imposter for a little while. I'm coming back for sure - I'm guessing in two or three days I'll already be scheming about the next one. And this is definitely going to get my fitness and riding up to scratch for the Amageza - which was the master plan anyway. Three laps done - not too bad for a first attempt, but I'm going faster next time! The little bike was brilliant, but the suspension needs some serious attention. It's six years old - an oil change and re-gas is a good start, and maybe some new front springs because I was bottoming out a lot. It's a strong little goat - I definitely have enough power, for now anyway!
Clearly I have work to do on the old body!! I do quite a bit of long distance cycling, and unfortunately I suffer a lot from cramps in endurance events, but this was one of the worst ever. I probably need to work out some kind of proper rehydrate/electrolyte system, and I may not have drunk enough. Bailey/Richard from the forum was kind enough to swing over this shot - a helmet cam for sure next time! Bring it!
Topic: Racing Panda's AWESOME AMAGEZA 2014: START TO about halfway. (Read 51249 times)