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Offline Garfield

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Consolidated list of...
« on: June 08, 2014, 03:41:48 pm »
...last minute k@k excuses for missing a ride...

Please post your three favorite last minute excuses here, I will consolidate and sort as we go.

For those guys who have more than three, feel free to post more, lets not limit riders who are good at this  :biggrin:

Also, do not post real excuses, if you wrote off your bike or yourself it is not seen as a k@k excuse to not ride, it is sad and we will have sympathy with you  :'(

So, if you recently had to have your femur polished on a morning you committed to ride, please list it here.

1.  It is cold
2.  Windguru predicts .000004mm of rain
3.  I overslept
4.  My bikes rear tyre is flat (having known about it for two weeks I was unable to find a bike shop open to assist/BMW On Call refused to do a call-out over the weekend)
5.  ...

Please contribute freely, those among us not well versed in using k@k excuses or lack the talent/inspiration to think these up can certainly use these in future  :thumleft:

PS: If I do not respond quickly on this thread, do not worry, I am probably busy washing hair...
 

Offline Brodes

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #1 on: June 08, 2014, 04:23:28 pm »
Ping Pampoen.
He's the real expert here - has excuses too numerous to mention, but suggest you put him on speed dial in case you need an excuse at short notice.
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Offline Crossed-up

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #2 on: June 08, 2014, 04:37:31 pm »
"I've got to work".  Yeah, right.  We all know WDs don't work because they watch the forum all day.
 

Offline ButchH

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #3 on: June 08, 2014, 04:41:50 pm »
Who is going to be there ! Fuck that  :deal:
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Offline ec guy

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #4 on: June 08, 2014, 08:05:51 pm »
"I've got to work".  Yeah, right.  We all know WDs don't work because they watch the forum all day.


 :spitcoffee:
The only thing that comes to he who waits. Is old age.
 

Offline Operator

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #5 on: June 08, 2014, 08:07:22 pm »
Bike wouldnt start. I think it is the battery that is dead.
 

Offline gunsports

Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #6 on: June 09, 2014, 08:33:33 am »
Mommy said: NO!
 

Offline ss

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #7 on: June 09, 2014, 08:36:52 am »
wanted to go but the wife parked the bike in.
 

Offline Tommy Transalp

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #8 on: June 09, 2014, 08:39:05 am »
Too babelaas to ride... scared I'l kotch in my helmet!
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Offline silvrav

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #9 on: June 09, 2014, 08:43:28 am »
one i have heard alot : "cant find my bike keys....sorry guys, go on without me"
 

Offline TheBear

Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #10 on: June 09, 2014, 08:45:55 am »
Mommy said: NO!

This is usually the reason that leads to all the other excuses!   :imaposer:
.#BRADICAL!
 

Offline subie

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #11 on: June 09, 2014, 08:47:28 am »
 :lol8:
And then there is the oke's that always "commit" to the trip ,early in the ride planning, which you know from
past planned rides, never pitched. So you have to read about their "enthusiasm" for the ride over a couple of posts
 while you also know, it is a dead certain no show.
Last minute bike breakdowns or faults seems to be their favourite excuses .   :spitcoffee:

Best excuse for not attending this years Nat Bash :-   A couple of buds and I will be touring the Cederburg at exactly the same time. Will not make it once again.   :snorting:
« Last Edit: June 09, 2014, 08:50:22 am by subie »
As time washes by, our footprints are all for naught
 

Offline Garfield

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #12 on: June 09, 2014, 09:09:59 am »
A few use-able ones posted so far  :thumleft:

Interesting to note that none of the experts have contributed yet  :pot:

Maybe they have a good excuse for that too  :peepwall:
 

Offline ss

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #13 on: June 09, 2014, 10:15:34 am »
Friend of mine said if the wife gives me trouble when I want to ride, I must dot the following:
        1. Pack the bike the night before,
        2. Park the bike outside the garage,
        3. Have aggat ready to put on and do the quick escape.
        4. If it does not work, well pull her over your lap and give her a "moer" of a hiding and then go.

I did all of this. However when I wanted to get out of the house, she started with her shit. So I grabbed her, pulled her over my lap, pull down the panties for the perfect hiding, looked at it was lying in front of me and then decided it was to cold to ride anyway.
 

Offline Firecoast

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #14 on: June 09, 2014, 10:17:09 am »
 :laughing4: :laughing4:
"Travel only with thy equals or thy betters; if there are none, travel alone."
 

Offline fredda

Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #15 on: June 09, 2014, 10:29:24 am »
 :spitcoffee:
Sounds reasonable
Current bike: 2011 BMW R1200R
 

Offline Garfield

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #16 on: June 09, 2014, 10:35:11 am »
Friend of mine said if the wife gives me trouble when I want to ride, I must dot the following:
        1. Pack the bike the night before,
        2. Park the bike outside the garage,
        3. Have aggat ready to put on and do the quick escape.
        4. If it does not work, well pull her over your lap and give her a "moer" of a hiding and then go.

I did all of this. However when I wanted to get out of the house, she started with her shit. So I grabbed her, pulled her over my lap, pull down the panties for the perfect hiding, looked at it was lying in front of me and then decided it was to cold to ride anyway.

This is a perfectly reasonable excuse  :thumleft:

Could happen to anyone.
 

Offline Tommy Transalp

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #17 on: June 09, 2014, 12:02:03 pm »
Friend of mine said if the wife gives me trouble when I want to ride, I must dot the following:
        1. Pack the bike the night before,
        2. Park the bike outside the garage,
        3. Have aggat ready to put on and do the quick escape.
        4. If it does not work, well pull her over your lap and give her a "moer" of a hiding and then go.

I did all of this. However when I wanted to get out of the house, she started with her shit. So I grabbed her, pulled her over my lap, pull down the panties for the perfect hiding, looked at it was lying in front of me and then decided it was to cold to ride anyway.

This is a perfectly reasonable excuse  :thumleft:

Could happen to anyone.
So was your departure delayed? (didn't know whether he was COMING or GOING!) :ricky:
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Offline Welsh

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #18 on: June 09, 2014, 12:24:11 pm »
A reasonable excuse for being 2 minutes late,,,,,
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Offline subie

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Re: Consolidated list of...
« Reply #19 on: June 09, 2014, 01:01:48 pm »
Friend of mine said if the wife gives me trouble when I want to ride, I must dot the following:
        1. Pack the bike the night before,
        2. Park the bike outside the garage,
        3. Have aggat ready to put on and do the quick escape.
        4. If it does not work, well pull her over your lap and give her a "moer" of a hiding and then go.

I did all of this. However when I wanted to get out of the house, she started with her shit. So I grabbed her, pulled her over my lap, pull down the panties for the perfect hiding, looked at it was lying in front of me and then decided it was to cold to ride anyway.

Valid excuse   :thumleft:  :laughing4:
« Last Edit: June 09, 2014, 01:02:43 pm by subie »
As time washes by, our footprints are all for naught