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Author Topic: So..lets define a biker  (Read 4022 times)

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Online Renrew

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #60 on: July 20, 2018, 07:58:36 am »
Basically Altie drinks his own piss and catches his food with snares he fashioned himself. Then he hasn’t even gotten on the bike yet... Imagine...


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Altie and myself ride 701's.

When we do trips, small animals come up and offer themselves as food.

Squirrels bring us beer that they steal at the local pub.

We have to stealth camp to avoid the gridlock of women following us.

Not only are we bikers, we are so at a next level. :deal:

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Offline BiG DoM

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #61 on: July 20, 2018, 08:30:03 am »
They used to say (yes in the days when the air was clean and sex was dirty) that a biker was someone who could tell the type of bug by the taste of it in his mouth. True story.
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Offline Oubones

Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #62 on: July 20, 2018, 08:55:50 am »
They used to say (yes in the days when the air was clean and sex was dirty) that a biker was someone who could tell the type of bug by the taste of it in his mouth. True story.
Some bugs have green stinky goo!
Yup, no did not take it in the mouth. :imaposer:
If you listen to some off the guys around a fire, the bugs jumped out before they could even taste them!
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Offline BiG DoM

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #63 on: July 20, 2018, 09:31:23 am »
They used to say (yes in the days when the air was clean and sex was dirty) that a biker was someone who could tell the type of bug by the taste of it in his mouth. True story.
Some bugs have green stinky goo!
Yup, no did not take it in the mouth. :imaposer:
If you listen to some off the guys around a fire, the bugs jumped out before they could even taste them!

Ja nevermind Harley riders - they are all stuck to the back of their helmets - as they fly faster  :laughing4:
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Offline jaybiker

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #64 on: July 20, 2018, 09:40:49 am »
Harley riders? Let's stay on topic - thought we were discussing bikers here.  ;) :pot:
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Offline 2wdrift

Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #65 on: July 20, 2018, 09:56:10 am »
They used to say (yes in the days when the air was clean and sex was dirty) that a biker was someone who could tell the type of bug by the taste of it in his mouth. True story.
One night I left a party with a friend who was visiting me from cape town and this one girl asked for a ride to her house as it was on the way. 2km of tar and 3 km of dirt to get to her parents place. So I took off my helmet and jacket, made her wear them and my friend lead the way out to look for cops. We were doing about 70-80 talking to each other when with my mouth open a stink bug hit me in the mouth and I of course then while trying to spit it out somehow bit it and it popped. For three days afterwards people would recoil from my breath if I spoke to them.

The taste closely matched the smell.
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Offline Firecoast

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #66 on: July 20, 2018, 10:00:30 am »
 :laughing4: :laughing4: :laughing4: :laughing4:
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Offline BiG DoM

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #67 on: July 20, 2018, 11:16:53 am »
They used to say (yes in the days when the air was clean and sex was dirty) that a biker was someone who could tell the type of bug by the taste of it in his mouth. True story.
One night I left a party with a friend who was visiting me from cape town and this one girl asked for a ride to her house as it was on the way. 2km of tar and 3 km of dirt to get to her parents place. So I took off my helmet and jacket, made her wear them and my friend lead the way out to look for cops. We were doing about 70-80 talking to each other when with my mouth open a stink bug hit me in the mouth and I of course then while trying to spit it out somehow bit it and it popped. For three days afterwards people would recoil from my breath if I spoke to them.

The taste closely matched the smell.

How was the good night kiss?  :imaposer:
"Love is the feeling you get when you like something as much as your motorcycle" - Hunter S. Thompson

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Offline 2wdrift

Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #68 on: July 20, 2018, 12:40:06 pm »
They used to say (yes in the days when the air was clean and sex was dirty) that a biker was someone who could tell the type of bug by the taste of it in his mouth. True story.
One night I left a party with a friend who was visiting me from cape town and this one girl asked for a ride to her house as it was on the way. 2km of tar and 3 km of dirt to get to her parents place. So I took off my helmet and jacket, made her wear them and my friend lead the way out to look for cops. We were doing about 70-80 talking to each other when with my mouth open a stink bug hit me in the mouth and I of course then while trying to spit it out somehow bit it and it popped. For three days afterwards people would recoil from my breath if I spoke to them.

The taste closely matched the smell.

How was the good night kiss?  :imaposer:
Her father was outside when we arrived...

He did laugh at the story for a good minute or two.
XR650R the one and only
Calling upon my years of experience, I froze at the controls.  ~Stirling Moss

Don't worry my stutter is also bilingual...
 

Offline Serfie

Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #69 on: July 20, 2018, 12:46:56 pm »
Previous job I had, I had a company car and a petrol card. I took the bike to work every Friday, costing me money out of my pocket, but I wanted to ride.
You are not a biker.


Seems by your own admission that you too are only a commuter...NOT a biker  :sip:
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Offline Altie7deLaan

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #70 on: July 20, 2018, 12:59:40 pm »
Whoop whoop lets get technical!
if you were born without a anus, its impossible to be a asshole?
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Offline BiG DoM

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #71 on: July 20, 2018, 01:09:26 pm »
Whoop whoop lets get technical!
if you were born without a anus, its impossible to be a asshole?

Ja then you just talk shit.  :imaposer:
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Offline Bokveld

Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #72 on: July 20, 2018, 01:19:14 pm »
Regte bikers sit nie skaapvelle op hul bike seats nie.
Ek dink jy gaan eendag n onsmaaklike oumens wees. :imaposer:
 

Offline Dwerg

Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #73 on: July 20, 2018, 01:21:49 pm »
I own a bike trailer yet I don't have a car   :o
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Offline Oubones

Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #74 on: July 20, 2018, 01:22:35 pm »
Regte bikers sit nie skaapvelle op hul bike seats nie.
Ek dink jy gaan eendag n onsmaaklike oumens wees. :imaposer:
Met eelte op sy agterent!
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Offline Altie7deLaan

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #75 on: July 20, 2018, 02:05:26 pm »
Regte bikers sit nie skaapvelle op hul bike seats nie.
Ek dink jy gaan eendag n onsmaaklike oumens wees. :imaposer:

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Online Sabre

Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #76 on: July 20, 2018, 08:55:04 pm »
I’d really prefer not to even be defined as a biker to start with. That word... eek

I ride offroad motorcycles.

A guy with black leathers on his street bike, or a lad with his gsxr or zx10 and fox shirt wearing oakleys without kit that goes to buffalo rallies are bikers.

I consider it quite an insult really. Go to a KTM rallye vs one of those buffalo rallies and you’ll appreciate the difference.

Who cares about what defines a “real” biker anyway? Very pedestrian.



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Offline BlueBull2007

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #77 on: July 20, 2018, 11:42:43 pm »
2wdDrift - did you at least get the girl? Really funny story, I can just imagine you blabbing away and then cough, splutter, WTF, yeeaarrghh! :laughing4:

I must confess the idea of being a "Motorcyclist" sounds really poncy to me. I hope I am not one of those... ;D

Not sure I am a biker either....these day when you tell them that, people respond with a nasally "Oh, really? Well I know of some great mountain bike routes in bla bla bla"  ???

So instead of defining what I am I just say "I relly, relly laaik dert baaiks." and most of the time people just give me a glazed over WTF look.


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Offline 2wdrift

Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #78 on: July 21, 2018, 04:28:49 pm »
2wdDrift - did you at least get the girl? Really funny story, I can just imagine you blabbing away and then cough, splutter, WTF, yeeaarrghh! :laughing4:

I must confess the idea of being a "Motorcyclist" sounds really poncy to me. I hope I am not one of those... ;D

Not sure I am a biker either....these day when you tell them that, people respond with a nasally "Oh, really? Well I know of some great mountain bike routes in bla bla bla"  ???

So instead of defining what I am I just say "I relly, relly laaik dert baaiks." and most of the time people just give me a glazed over WTF look.
No I never had another chance like that with her...
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Offline Mother

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Re: So..lets define a biker
« Reply #79 on: July 31, 2018, 04:43:16 pm »
Well, Meurig, thanks for sharing that. The obvious question is whether you ever have sex on your bike (with a mother or not), and how many times a week...?! :biggrin:

Is this hijacking the thread...?

Whahahaha

“A mother...” that’s funny




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@Mother will take offence

Hahaha guess he just trying to make his point that he is a mother f$&ken biker
mother ....only half a word ;-)