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Offline Oubones

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #40 on: October 10, 2018, 01:48:17 pm »
After a Saturday evening BRAAI and a few dops we decided to visit our favorite stoep in Hilbrow. There where you could buy a Fontana chicken and fresh rolls 24h a day.
Eish those Fontana chicken sommer on the pavement was great( around 4/5am) :peepwall:
I got a Honda Hawk while NS and my Bil took it for a spin down the road with all of us( including his kids and the neighbours) watching and coming back he went nuts, left the handlebars , started slapping himself and then racing up to us killing the bike and jumping off while tearing his shirt off!
A brakpan red wasp had zapped him a nice Z on his back. :imaposer:
He never got on my bike again!
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Online woody1

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Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #41 on: October 10, 2018, 02:15:13 pm »
Another Fontana Hilbrow moment.

Most Wednesday evenings and most weekends when we were not at Kayalami  or going to Vryheid KZN we ended up on the STOEP.
Just sitting on your bike, chatting and people watching.

So one Friday night we were just minding our own business when this group of troepe pulled in.  Already lekker warm on Polisiekoffie.
So we started sharing the Polisiekoffie with them.
Later Kassie.. yes the same guy that split us on the road remembers that he still have two bottles of wine at the Spoorweg Single Quarters in Langlaagte.
So he hops on the back of my GS1000G and off we went to fetch the wine to share with our troepe pelle.

We came back and really enjoyed the evening with the troepe.

Where all the booze came from I will not know.

The next day when I woke up in the JHB GEN Hospital I was told the following story:

Some time during our KUIER I was doing doughnuts on the STOEP.
Then this dude on a klapped out old Honda tried the same.  He could not even get a puff of smoke from his tyre.
Apparently I told him his Honda was a piece of shit.
I cannot remember that and also I did not even know there was a fight.
Apparently the fight was over quickly and I was taken away in an ambulance with concussion.

Great times in Hilbrow.  :ricky:

I WOULD RATHER BE AN HONEST ASSHOLE .... THAN A FLIPPEN LIAR !   


Ducati 100cc Mountaineer, Honda 550 K3, Suzuki Gs1000E, Suzuki Gs1000G, Suzuki 1100 Katana, BMW R1100RT, BMW R1150RT,,,,,All gone. Only 2014 ST in the garage at the moment... And Honda XL 600
 

Offline Oubones

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #42 on: October 10, 2018, 03:06:53 pm »
Hehe
You should have seen us, me short fast lighty and Gav, huge big strong oke but like a rhino, walking up Quarts street. :peepwall:
Racing Claim street early hours off the morning was good sports and then skip into Quartz. :thumleft:
Ai, die jong dae.
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Online woody1

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Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #43 on: October 10, 2018, 03:14:24 pm »
He he.

Nadat ou Kassie sy knie verloor het in 'n motorfiets oepsie....dronk van Kayalami af terug huis toe .. het ek hom op my rug gelaai, die trappe van die gay susters bar opgedra om daar bo te gaan twak soek....sorrie biertjie te drink.  :laughing4: 
As ons daar bo aankom vra die AUNTIE...Weet julle wat se bar is die ? Dan se Kassie Ja sussie gooi 'n dop...  :imaposer:

I WOULD RATHER BE AN HONEST ASSHOLE .... THAN A FLIPPEN LIAR !   


Ducati 100cc Mountaineer, Honda 550 K3, Suzuki Gs1000E, Suzuki Gs1000G, Suzuki 1100 Katana, BMW R1100RT, BMW R1150RT,,,,,All gone. Only 2014 ST in the garage at the moment... And Honda XL 600
 

Offline Oubones

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #44 on: October 10, 2018, 03:20:43 pm »
He he.

Nadat ou Kassie sy knie verloor het in 'n motorfiets oepsie....dronk van Kayalami af terug huis toe .. het ek hom op my rug gelaai, die trappe van die gay susters bar opgedra om daar bo te gaan twak soek....sorrie biertjie te drink.  :laughing4: 
As ons daar bo aankom vra die AUNTIE...Weet julle wat se bar is die ? Dan se Kassie Ja sussie gooi 'n dop...  :imaposer:
Hel, dit vat grotes of baie onnosel!
Respek! :thumleft:
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Offline Saddle Up

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #45 on: October 10, 2018, 03:25:08 pm »
Donner Woody. Klink my ons het by dieselfde plekke uitgehang. My vriend het 'n moerse pak slae by die anderse anties gekry. Ek het hom in die toilet opgetel. Uitgepass met sy oor op die vloer in die mis pis :imaposer:
n Skaap is nie n scrambler
 

Online woody1

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Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #46 on: October 10, 2018, 03:28:39 pm »
Ek kan nog Baie stories vertel van Hillbrow en ook Grab 'n Granny op Heidelbergweg rigting Alberton.  :3some: :ricky: :ricky:

I WOULD RATHER BE AN HONEST ASSHOLE .... THAN A FLIPPEN LIAR !   


Ducati 100cc Mountaineer, Honda 550 K3, Suzuki Gs1000E, Suzuki Gs1000G, Suzuki 1100 Katana, BMW R1100RT, BMW R1150RT,,,,,All gone. Only 2014 ST in the garage at the moment... And Honda XL 600
 

Offline Saddle Up

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #47 on: October 10, 2018, 03:35:29 pm »
Grab a granny  by Milpark Holiday Inn. My Kawasaki het sommer van self in one ways op gery weerskante van Highpoint. Goeie lawwe tye.
n Skaap is nie n scrambler
 

Offline Oubones

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #48 on: October 10, 2018, 03:36:01 pm »
Ek kan nog Baie stories vertel van Hillbrow en ook Grab 'n Granny op Heidelbergweg rigting Alberton.  :3some: :ricky: :ricky:
O hel HKGK :peepwall:
Lyk my ons moet n kak aangejaag in die 80s reunie hou, ons pak die stoele sommer klaar by die hek! :imaposer:
Anderkant was dit Ontdekkersweg of R28! :peepwall:
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Online woody1

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Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #49 on: October 10, 2018, 03:36:21 pm »
Lekker ou tye gewees.  :laughing4:

I WOULD RATHER BE AN HONEST ASSHOLE .... THAN A FLIPPEN LIAR !   


Ducati 100cc Mountaineer, Honda 550 K3, Suzuki Gs1000E, Suzuki Gs1000G, Suzuki 1100 Katana, BMW R1100RT, BMW R1150RT,,,,,All gone. Only 2014 ST in the garage at the moment... And Honda XL 600
 

Online woody1

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Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #50 on: October 10, 2018, 03:37:32 pm »
Ek kan nog Baie stories vertel van Hillbrow en ook Grab 'n Granny op Heidelbergweg rigting Alberton.  :3some: :ricky: :ricky:
O hel HKGK :peepwall:
Lyk my ons moet n kak aangejaag in die 80s reunie hou, ons pak die stoele sommer klaar by die hek! :imaposer:
Anderkant was dit Ontdekkersweg of R28! :peepwall:

Onjdekkers... Daai Laaaaaaaang straat  :ricky:

I WOULD RATHER BE AN HONEST ASSHOLE .... THAN A FLIPPEN LIAR !   


Ducati 100cc Mountaineer, Honda 550 K3, Suzuki Gs1000E, Suzuki Gs1000G, Suzuki 1100 Katana, BMW R1100RT, BMW R1150RT,,,,,All gone. Only 2014 ST in the garage at the moment... And Honda XL 600
 

Offline Saddle Up

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #51 on: October 10, 2018, 03:54:00 pm »
Remember the dreaded shoelace loop caught on the gear lever? On my way to work one morning, entered a blind left hander with my attention on the unhooking of the takkie lace. As I straightened up there's a powder blue Ford Cortina at the yield . I hit the back, went over the bars and hit my helmet on the rear window. All I saw was BIG blue eye shadowed eyes looking at me in the rear view mirror. I then somehow fell back on the seat and kept the bike upright.
n Skaap is nie n scrambler
 

Offline jaybiker

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Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #52 on: October 10, 2018, 04:58:06 pm »
I'm sure it's like this with most bikers that have been around for a few years. The stories that I could recall which would have all my old buddies convulsed in stitches would fall flat in the re-telling on this forum, because you just had to be there!  :3some:

Like the time when my Triumph twin with a broken conrod had to be rescued, but the only recovery vehicle available was a mate's  old 650cc single Panther sidecar outfit, with the sidecar body removed and my Mom's kitchen table top strapped on the sidecar chassis to make a flat load body.
The story of that exercise, if told by a good comedy raconteur, could have audiences flocking to pay good money to hear about it!

And the time when four of us decided to go to a road race meeting, but instead of leaving early in the morning like "normal" people, oh no, we had to set off late at night after the pub closed, and 'camp' (without tents) at the circuit. Trouble was, no sooner had we got going when it started to rain. A committee meeting resolved that it was just a few spots, nothing to stop us carrying on, it would soon stop, but it didn't. It absolutely pissed down. Eventually, soaked and freezing we spotted alongside the road a farmer's large flat bed trailer, and decided that this would provide our shelter for the night. We felt that what we needed was a fire to warm us up and dry us out. (What we really needed was a bloody re-hab programme to properly dry us out!)
All we could find was wet firewood, but we managed to ignite it with some petrol from one of the bikes, and of course we lit the fire right in the centre of the space under the trailer. Wonderful idea, the smoke from the wet wood absolutely choked and blinded us. When we arrived at the circuit in the morning, there were the rest of our mates all clean and fresh, and full of "sympathy" of course  :imaposer: for the blackened bedraggled bunch of twats who only wanted to get there before them. ::)
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Offline benreaper

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #53 on: October 10, 2018, 09:52:53 pm »
Some funny story's here!

I have always loved doing(trying to do) wheelies, have never had very good balance though, but that hasn't stopped me from trying.

I had a Honda MB100 in high school, myself and a mate of mine went to watch stockars at our local track one Saturday afternoon with the bike. During half time we headed to the tuck shop for something to eat and drink, we didn't have a backpack to put the stuff in so my buddy had to hold the food and drinks. I had stopped with the backwheel in a hole and I had to give it some throttle to get out. Me revving up the 2stroker attracted the attention of the people on the pavilion nearby and as I dropped the clutch I went flying away on the back wheel leaving my buddy behind on his butt in front of an amused audience.....

One afternoon I pulled out of the school gates with another buddy on the back of the bike. As I turned into the street there were some girls standing next to the road and I decided to impress them with a wheelie not knowing my mate was still busy fastening his helmet and not holding on. Once again I jetted of on the rear wheel leaving by buddy behind on his butt in the middle of the road in front of the girls.....

One day it would seem Karma would finally catch up to me....
Many years later one Saturday afternoon on my way home from work on my XJR400 I pulled into a red light next to a laaitie on a small scrambler. He was checking out my bike and I thought I'd give him a show.
As we pulled away I popped the bike onto the rear wheel and as I hit balancing point my chain came of.
I knew the chain was streched and was planning on tensioning it when I got home.
Too late though, the chain came of, I was to slow on the back brake and moered of the back onto my butt on the middle of the road (basically a flip) watching my bike doing cartwheels down the road. Was almost in tears at the time, but looking back now can't help to laugh at myself.....
 

Offline JFE

Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #54 on: October 11, 2018, 06:31:57 am »
.....
One afternoon I pulled out of the school gates with another buddy on the back of the bike. As I turned into the street there were some girls standing next to the road and I decided to impress them with a wheelie not knowing my mate was still busy fastening his helmet and not holding on. Once again I jetted of on the rear wheel leaving by buddy behind on his butt in the middle of the road in front of the girls..........
My brother did the exact same thing to me, him at college and me still a school laaitie. What he didnt expect was my flexibility at that tender age, I simply had my one leg clamped under his arm round his chest and the other foot turned in smack bang in front of his visor obstructing his view. I refused to go down by myself. Somehow he managed to keep us upright but when the front wheel came down I had a lot of momentum coming from way back low down and the clash of helmets almost sent us over the front.



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« Last Edit: October 11, 2018, 06:33:01 am by JFE »
 

Offline Africanus

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #55 on: October 11, 2018, 07:39:50 am »
Ek kan nog Baie stories vertel van Hillbrow en ook Grab 'n Granny op Heidelbergweg rigting Alberton.  :3some: :ricky: :ricky:

Daai grab 'n granny was die ou Taylors Travel Lodge in die dip wat hulle platgeslaan het. Newmarket Hotel (Jockey Bar) ook platgeslaan en 'n Ford dealership geword. Af in die straat die Alberton Hotel met sy pool hall en whatnot.

Later jare Presleys in die container depot. Anderkant Alberton op die seldfe pad was die Rainbow drag strip en Margo's wat in die 70's baie bikers getrek het.

By Newmarket een jaar 'n ou gesien omdop by die robot toe hy uitry op een van die heel eerste Ninjas. Hy't vergeet om sy voete uit te sit toe hy stop by die rooi lig.


 
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Offline Saddle Up

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #56 on: October 11, 2018, 07:46:56 am »
Ha. I just remembered an incident /accident. I had my younger brother on the  back of a Gamma, as I leaned into the corner going around the block, he falls off with his left leg caught on the bike. I lost it and went straight up the curb. Him bouncing over it. I then smacked a wall, he was whipped past me into the prefab.
We killed ourselves laughing.
n Skaap is nie n scrambler
 

Offline Kortbroek

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #57 on: October 11, 2018, 08:05:00 am »

Many years later one Saturday afternoon on my way home from work on my XJR400 I pulled into a red light next to a laaitie on a small scrambler. He was checking out my bike and I thought I'd give him a show.
As we pulled away I popped the bike onto the rear wheel and as I hit balancing point my chain came of.
I knew the chain was streched and was planning on tensioning it when I got home.
Too late though, the chain came of, I was to slow on the back brake and moered of the back onto my butt on the middle of the road (basically a flip) watching my bike doing cartwheels down the road. Was almost in tears at the time, but looking back now can't help to laugh at myself.....

Man I know this feeling. It is always the same story even if the players and location changes  :imaposer:
Riding up Victoria road in Stellenbosch there are always pretty girls walking next to the road. Popped it onto the back wheel, hooked 2nd and the chain broke. fortunately I was covering the rear brake, but man did I feel like a twat standing on the sidewalk trying to not look in the direction of said girls as they walked past.  :redface:
- you reckon that thing will pop a wheelie? We're about to find out, SLAP that pig!
 

Online Pullaway

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #58 on: October 11, 2018, 10:15:55 am »
Early eighties a buddy came out of Tygerberg Hospital some six months after a serious car accident. Both legs still in huge wooden boxes with pins through his legs. Still immobile, he asked if he can borrow my bike to go to the nurses res at Tygerberg Hospital to visit a nurse he met while in hospital. Now he has basically been in bed for more than six months, so his balance is not very good. So we strap his legs to the tank of my RD350 and helped him of with a little push to get going. The plan was he would ride there, try not to stop all the way from Stellenbosch to the Hospital res, stop against a wall where she can help him to get off the bike. He was suppose to change the gears with his hand. With a lot of luck he actually made it to the N1, where he crashed, totalling my bike. 
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Offline Kortbroek

Re: Funny motorcycle stories
« Reply #59 on: October 11, 2018, 10:57:06 am »
Early eighties a buddy came out of Tygerberg Hospital some six months after a serious car accident. Both legs still in huge wooden boxes with pins through his legs. Still immobile, he asked if he can borrow my bike to go to the nurses res at Tygerberg Hospital to visit a nurse he met while in hospital. Now he has basically been in bed for more than six months, so his balance is not very good. So we strap his legs to the tank of my RD350 and helped him of with a little push to get going. The plan was he would ride there, try not to stop all the way from Stellenbosch to the Hospital res, stop against a wall where she can help him to get off the bike. He was suppose to change the gears with his hand. With a lot of luck he actually made it to the N1, where he crashed, totalling my bike.

 :imaposer: Donner I mean, I'm no rocket scientist but I sure that outcome could've been predicted  :laughing4:

She must have been a looker I suppose
« Last Edit: October 11, 2018, 10:57:27 am by Kortbroek »
- you reckon that thing will pop a wheelie? We're about to find out, SLAP that pig!