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Author Topic: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga  (Read 11864 times)

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Offline Wayne

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #100 on: August 30, 2019, 07:41:29 am »
Another thread that is on the first to view in the morning.

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Offline Dirty Boy

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #101 on: August 30, 2019, 08:51:02 am »
BOZO I think you can stop worrying about the LHC because I found a few mistakes in your manuscript.
1. I think you got your bagels mixed up with croissants. Bagels are an Israeli pasty I think.
2. Switzerland don't make cars, they hate cars
3. Volvo's are from Sweden
 

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #102 on: August 30, 2019, 10:27:27 am »
Need to go for a crap now - just to test the exercise you see...  :sip: :patch: :peepwall:
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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #103 on: August 30, 2019, 04:52:26 pm »
 :spitcoffee:   :lol8:   :imaposer:

such an awesome thread, still  :thumleft:  :thumleft:


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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #104 on: September 01, 2019, 02:20:11 am »
BOZO I think you can stop worrying about the LHC because I found a few mistakes in your manuscript.
1. I think you got your bagels mixed up with croissants. Bagels are an Israeli pasty I think.
2. Switzerland don't make cars, they hate cars
3. Volvo's are from Sweden
Thank goodness  :laughing4: now that I know that bagels are from Israel I can cancel my monthly subscription of best moments of Krav Maga  :lol8:
Again I'm an ambassador for education and I appreciate you pointing out that Switzerland dont make cars, I should have know that, that's where I have my numbers bank account with my imaginary millions. :imaposer:
SHWEEEeeeeeeeeeedddonnnnnnn and Volvos.... need I say more.  :imaposer:
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #105 on: September 01, 2019, 02:22:01 am »
Need to go for a crap now - just to test the exercise you see...  :sip: :patch: :peepwall:

It works ne'  :peepwall:
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #106 on: September 01, 2019, 02:52:22 am »
What do the Islanders do for entertainment I hear you ask.. (I imagine that I hear you)
Well, if they aren’t servicing their hot-rods or watching the footy they are having dress up parties. And why the hell not, it’s an island where moving away from the coast line could have perilous effects on your well being.
Apparently moving out of the 80’s is also pretty dangerous. Here your average school going kid seems to be stuck in the movie “back to the future” where they have long hair and wear life jackets for jerseys, their parents still drive a clapped out DeLorean, and I’m sure that they smoke pot with an uncle called doc brown.
The long term effects of this, are that you develop an accent that even makes the POMS cringe, and every sentence needs a “mate” thrown in. To end it off for good measure, you need to throw in a “No worries”  :lol8:
Lets back track a touch here… I think that if I were to contextualize this it would make heaps more sense.
Being stock standard South Africans we have gotten used to the miracle of DSTV. Yes its expensive and Yes 60% of the channels are in one of the official languages that we can’t understand and the other 50% of the 40% have got soccer playing or some other crap. But the last 20% is good.
There is rugby, golf,cricket, series, catch-up and movies.
And no advertisements…….yes and that’s why we pay the money…. no advertisements……
This island is different. There are 15 to 20 channels free. They are all English…And free……..
And they are all digital……. So our 2 TV’s that we brought out here don’t work……… >:(……….ANNNYYYYYWAY……. Back to the free part.
It’s great that the TV channels are free. We get to watch NEWS, Footy, reruns of M.A.S.H and Neighbours, ( ♪ everybody loves good Neighbours ♪ )…… and adverts.
In fact the real reason that all these Channels are free are the adverts. The problem is that they are so long that 3 out of 4 people in our house that suffer from (ADHD….DHDDHAHAAHDD) forgot what was on when the ad breaks started.
I kid you not!!! In one add break I counted 14 Adverts...
And really M.A.S.H ? I’m also tired of hearing about a crocodile that crossed a road 5000km away.. or some other random shit. 
And that’s how FREE TV became very old very quickly.
To be continued....
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #107 on: September 01, 2019, 05:46:24 am »
With Free TV sucking so badly we went to a Quiz evening.
It was a dress up and we had to come garbed for the 80’s theme, apparently we had to go as school kids.
Wonder Woman had pig tails and looked like she used to in standard 9.
All the thoughts that I had in Standard 9 came rushing back in a mental assault that would have made a fitter man blind and hairy palmed.  At least I know that with the correct amount of red wine and wooing one of those thoughts was going to come true.  :lol8:
For this occasion, we met up with a Saffa that we were in school with and her Aussie Mates.
Of all the people that we run into over the years, some improve, some get worse, some get shorter but maintain the same weight, some get better looking and some, just remain dickheads.
Well. Nicola has not changed, she is still a laugh a minute and her infectious personality has everyone at ease and laughing in minutes.
The Quiz was held at a School Hall that was decked out with a round tables, dance floor, balloons, sound system, posters, bright lights… zonkie…
The Quiz master (straight outta “back to the future”) was an humorous chap that had a microphone and walked around selling clues to tables to help them win the final prize.
His method was to lean over the answer sheet at your table and read the answers and then announce into the microphone “NIIIICCE”. But “NIIIICCE” would come randomly. Like mid-sentence random.
I was sitting next to an Aussie (go figure!!) at our table that was getting slightly more irritated with this as the evening went on.
Quiz Master(QM) “ ok mates, what is the largest…….NIIICEEE…………landlocked……NIIIICEE……country….. no mate, the other one is wrong. Yes that one…..NIIICEE….. in the world….NIIIICE”
Steve* (not his real name) “Mate this mate is killing me” 
QM:“NIIIICE” “……..
Steve:.. I’m getting my sheep’s wool in a tangle”…
QM:“NIIIICE” 
Steve:“ ……..So Mate how do you know Nicola?”
Me(GIT) :“ We were in school together”
Steve: “ Really Mate?”  ….
QM:“NIICE” “……
Steve:….”All my Mates from school are either dead or in Jail…”
QM:“NICCCE” “ …
Steve: …”Mate this Quiz master is starting to work me up”
Me(GIT) :“ Shit Really”….. (thinking to myself I really should have worn the Nike takkies)………”I, erm, I, did you get that last question? “ slides to a safe distance in case he tries to shiv me with a plastic spoon.
Anyway the evening went on and on and we were eventually beaten by the table with the most Chinese people.
Shortly after that the QM gets on the Mic and says thanks for coming please remember to clean up after yourselves.
I’m thinking sure no problem I’ll put my empty beers back into the cooler box and close the lid, at a stretch I will push my chair back in.
What he actually intended was clean, tidy, put away EVERYTHING like this never happened.
It was like having a party at home when your parents are out for a weekend and you invite your chommies around, after the party is done you need to clean up like it never happened.
That’s what he actually meant.
The clean-up happened quickly, it was like the riot police were standing outside the door, 30 adrenaline pumped freaks dressed in battle gear ready to take down a group of 7 year old’s, people jumped and started to clean.
Within 5 minutes the hall was clean, I was left standing holding a beer looking at my cooler box wondering if it could handle my weight when the lights went off.
BOOM party over go home…………
What fun we had. The next day as we sat and pondered over the events we laughed and laughed at our first dress up quiz evening. 
So that’s how we do entertainment on the island. :thumleft:
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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #108 on: September 01, 2019, 08:02:06 am »
My fok...

School clothes don’t come my size. Thanks fark...

Ah well, I would have quized “Steve” a bit more. Seemed like a few interesting stories hidden there >:D
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #109 on: September 01, 2019, 12:58:02 pm »
My fok...

School clothes don’t come my size. Thanks fark...

Ah well, I would have quized “Steve” a bit more. Seemed like a few interesting stories hidden there >:D
My school school clothes didn’t fit any more either. Seems my back has gotten a lot bigger over the years.

I have spent a couple evenings with “Steve” since then. There are some proper stories there... all in good time, all in good time.


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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #110 on: September 03, 2019, 12:12:59 am »
Even though its only been a few days since posting these updates. the actual time that had passed was closer to 6 months. The reality of the situation was starting to settle in and we were adjusting to our new life.

Some of the things that I diddent write about that are worth sharing are how your family dynamic changes.
After the excitement of arriving wore off, life has to continue. We / I had no friends and I struggle to make friends. (like really struggle) The loneliness sets in and shortly after that comes something close to depression. Somehow in all of this we became closer as a family. Having to rely in each other for company 24/7, sharing laughs and fears and possibly even more importantly learning how to get over a fight and forgive quickly.

The Aussies are friendly enough people, and they love to have a long chat, but these conversations never go anywhere. If I were to describe it, its like having a chat to someone in the line at the bank. Nobody wants to be there but you have no choice.
And for me the biggest and hardest adjustment is the time zone difference. Weirdly being 8 / 9 hours ahead sucks.

They say that if you can get through 18 months in a new country it gets easier. I don't know if it gets easier I think you just get used to it.
Been here 3 years now, still lonely, and its still hard, every day.... But at least my Boys will have a future and thats the important bit.

Still plenty stories to come. Some you will see the thread of sadness and some you will see how i try to pull myself out of it. hope you are enjoying the ramblings of a broken mind  :biggrin:
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Offline TeeJay

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #111 on: September 03, 2019, 05:32:55 am »
Full on enjoying the stories - and yes please do tell the good and the bad - in it's raw form - it's good to hear how things really are - not just the rosy parts.

Thanks for the effort this takes - I do appreciate it  :thumleft:
Eat life!
 
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Offline Oubones

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #112 on: September 03, 2019, 06:50:08 am »
Thanks for sharing.
It is good to hear how it is from somebody there!
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Offline Willem-Ben

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #113 on: September 03, 2019, 07:53:55 am »
Yes please, As real as possible please.

Thanks Bozo
 

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #114 on: September 03, 2019, 08:41:07 am »
Some of the things that I diddent write about that are worth sharing are how your family dynamic changes.
After the excitement of arriving wore off, life has to continue. We / I had no friends and I struggle to make friends. (like really struggle) The loneliness sets in and shortly after that comes something close to depression. Somehow in all of this we became closer as a family. Having to rely in each other for company 24/7, sharing laughs and fears and possibly even more importantly learning how to get over a fight and forgive quickly.

That alone makes all this worthwhile in my humble opinion worth less than your 2c...

The Aussies are friendly enough people, and they love to have a long chat, but these conversations never go anywhere. If I were to describe it, its like having a chat to someone in the line at the bank. Nobody wants to be there but you have no choice.
And for me the biggest and hardest adjustment is the time zone difference. Weirdly being 8 / 9 hours ahead sucks.

I found that hard too as I used to love to communicate with the family.

They say that if you can get through 18 months in a new country it gets easier. I don't know if it gets easier I think you just get used to it.
Been here 3 years now, still lonely, and its still hard, every day.... But at least my Boys will have a future and thats the important bit.

Keep looking at it that way. My wife struggled the same but I'm easy that way. Will strike up an conversation with a lamp pole if I have to...

Still plenty stories to come. Some you will see the thread of sadness and some you will see how i try to pull myself out of it. hope you are enjoying the ramblings of a broken mind  :biggrin:

Dude, just remember why are are doing it and look at the current happenings here in SA - you have done the right thing. I wish I was a little more savvy - too old now...

Your sense of humour will get you through! :thumleft: :thumleft:
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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #115 on: September 03, 2019, 11:05:03 am »
Have no doubt in your mind. You made the correct choice.

Thanks for sharing though - very amusing!

my cousin lives over there now too. He schooled me in what a "Bogan" is after I commented on the general "class" of Aussie that I saw in Bali last year.......it's very apt description for them.
 

Offline immigrant

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #116 on: September 03, 2019, 11:48:39 am »

They say that if you can get through 18 months in a new country it gets easier. I don't know if it gets easier I think you just get used to it.
Been here 3 years now, still lonely, and its still hard, every day.... But at least my Boys will have a future and thats the important bit.
Interesting that you mention that. I find that all my “friendships” here get to a certain point, and then it’s just....over. Usually at the 3 month mark. It just dies. (Maybe it just takes them 3 months to realize I am actually a twatwaffle!?)
Luckily I am good friends with my neighbour. Which is cool, because he is a good friend, and he lives next to me. But apart from him there is no-one where I could go have a beer after work. It’s all very shallow  superficial friendships. 
« Last Edit: September 03, 2019, 01:26:29 pm by immigrant »
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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #117 on: September 03, 2019, 01:50:17 pm »

They say that if you can get through 18 months in a new country it gets easier. I don't know if it gets easier I think you just get used to it.
Been here 3 years now, still lonely, and its still hard, every day.... But at least my Boys will have a future and thats the important bit.
Interesting that you mention that. I find that all my “friendships” here get to a certain point, and then it’s just....over. Usually at the 3 month mark. It just dies. (Maybe it just takes them 3 months to realize I am actually a twatwaffle!?)
Luckily I am good friends with my neighbour. Which is cool, because he is a good friend, and he lives next to me. But apart from him there is no-one where I could go have a beer after work. It’s all very shallow  superficial friendships.

Lived in England for 3 years. Same problem. Other than housemates (shared house - big party) and the occasional work get-together, not much of a connection made at all. A situation that could be quite distressing to the social type of person.
 

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #118 on: September 03, 2019, 06:05:33 pm »
Bozo I enjoy your writing please keep it up. :thumleft:
In case I missed it what kind of work do you do?
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #119 on: September 03, 2019, 09:31:59 pm »
Thanks for all the replies. I will keep adding as I go.  :dark1:
Its easy to write about the good and thats the fun part. But one also needs to share the bad as that will give a real picture of life down under.
As I have insights I will add them. If you have any questions at all please add them here and I will answer them. (eventually)
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