Welcome, Guest. Please Login or Register

Author Topic: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.  (Read 4295 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline BigEd

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: NER-A-CAR
    Location: Western Cape
  • Posts: 1,691
  • Thanked: 23 times
  • Panorama, Cape Town
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #80 on: August 26, 2019, 08:42:47 am »
What did Wonder Woman say? :peepwall:
81 XT500 (sold) 82 GPZ550 (sold)
04 XL650V Transalp (sold) 01 XL1000V Varadero (sold)
88 DR750s Dr Big (sold) 01 R1150GS BMW (sold)
84 XT600 Tenere 34L (sold)
?? Trek 6000 flippen martelpyp (current)
 

Offline Grunder

  • Muscles can't buy mad dog!
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: BMW F800GS
    Location: Free State
  • Posts: 1,824
  • Thanked: 173 times
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #81 on: August 26, 2019, 11:30:54 am »
I still have not found the Swiss Robertson’s Family) and I wonder what I told you last.
Some of this may be repeated, but when you have a good story sometimes you need to tell it twice. ( sometimes A LOT MORE…..you know who you are  :deal:)
The problem with telling a story twice is you have to remember the important pieces, the dramatic pieces and bullshit pieces.
I’m sure by now you will realize that most stories are bland and boring but if you add 30% drama and 50% bullshit the important pieces are really enjoyable.
Firstly, our furniture has arrived.
We no longer need to camp like bogans (what’s a bogan I hear you ask) well ……..
A bogan is an Aussie slang word used to describe a person of “lower” working-class background, whose speech, clothing, attitude and behaviour exemplify values and behaviour considered unrefined or unsophisticated.





Is it strange that I can identify with these people?  Or is it just the really cool hairstyle that you can have and people don’t care?
I mean really a smoke, a stubby, and a pie…. What else could one want?...
Annnnyyyway….. we got our stuff and Wonder Woman took 3 days to unpack all the boxes, clean everything, and repack the cupboards….
These little tests of character that I designed on the boat trip to the island have been passed with flying colours,
When Wonder Woman applies for a job and puts me down for a reference I will be able to confidently say that she is going to be an asset to any organization..
Only a couple more tests to pass and I think she is ready to get out into the working world.
An additional test that I personally did not consider was unpacking the boxes with Spiderpig and Trento123 around.
All I can say is Kids are like socks.
Every now-and-again one disappears. When one disappears and the other one is around they are/it’s pretty useless especially when you need them to do their job. When you finally give up looking for the missing one it eventually pops up, like it’s always been there, and it’s your fault you couldn’t find it.
So now begins the battle of the adapters….
For all the sales people out there if you can find South African to Australian adapters and sell them on the net for less than $8 delivered you will make a fortune!!!! If anybody is keen to come out and do some market research, you can come to Melbourne. WE now have beds, couches, plates, coffee cups, even a decanter to put the box wine in.
Oh…
There is this one thing that I did do……that may be considered Bogan…
And I could not help myself, it’s a South African thing.. After Wonder Woman had unpacked the house in the shake of a lambs tail, we realized that Spiderpig needed a desk in his room, to do homework and such things. (his idea of the island was ruined directly after his first day of school, apparently there are also schools at the beach, and that sucks). 
I had steeled myself to get off the couch and venture off into the concrete jungle, battling Aussies, Chinese, and many others in this multicultural city, and old people to get to a SALVO’s or Kmart to buy a table. I grabbed the keys for SSWFP (Silver Suzuki with flappy paddles) asked if one of the minions wanted to come with. (got no answer…. Somethings never change) I charged off like the hero of any childhood story, to retrieve a hidden treasure. (I’m my mind I was prince charming, in reality probably closer to Shrek)
Armed with a hat, sunglasses, wallet, a quick sip of water to prevent dehydration, I summed up the the mental determination of a blind man trying to thread a needle, I was ready to come back victorious showing the fruits of my labour.
I was careening down the road, the blissful tunes of Metallica “enter the sandman” playing on the wireless, charged by male gusto and feeling brave as I was edging just on 62km/h in a 60 zone about to throw caution in to the wind, and turn corners without using the indicators when….. BOOM right there. On the side of the road. A table, the correct size, in good condition. And most importantly FREE…… yes people FREE. Now who doesn’t like free stuff. I had no choice…. I wrestled SSWFP to a stop (after indicating my intentions to do so) and took a picture and sent it to Wonder Woman.  My excitement was electric, I was going to bring home the bacon, the big whopper, and its FREE…….. Check it out (picture below)…
Pretty cool hey? 
Some might say Bogan, some might say tappit,
I say, if that was a case of beers would you stop. (absabloodyluutley) if you wouldn’t stop for a free case of beers please reply and I can remove you from this list.  :imaposer:

While I was staying in England many many years go.  I stayed with my cousin for a while.  They had no microwave.

One night (around 2am) I was on my way home from the pub and voila, there is a microwave standing on the sidewalk in front of a house (same scenario as yours).  Here I thought I would treat my cousin with a free microwave.  Picked it up and carried it home.  It was quite heavy so I was impressed. Thought it was a top of the range machine.

Got home and plugged it in immediately!!  Turned it on to check if it was working fine. 
The sound that came out of that thing was horrific and LOUD!!!!!  (2am in the morning)

Needless to say I took it out to the pavement and placed it there for the next sucker to find
honda nc700x; bmw f800gs
 

Offline BOZO

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: Yamaha XT 660 Z
    Location: Australia
  • Posts: 643
  • Thanked: 7 times
  • Eschew obfuscation
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #82 on: August 26, 2019, 12:24:24 pm »
We have to threaten the kids when it’s hard rubbish day here. The last time that happened they collected a bunch of crap and it stayed in our yard for a year. If I put it out on the pavement outside the allocated week I have to pay for the removal of it... $60 I think. If it gets “dumped” then the police puts crime tape around it and if you are caught.... well let’s just say, don’t get caught. These guys don’t mess around with their ticket books. If I see a crime scene I will take a photo and post it.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Pro
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
1150 GS, 1200 GSA, 125 KX, WR450  (all sold) :(
XT660Z
 

Offline BOZO

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: Yamaha XT 660 Z
    Location: Australia
  • Posts: 643
  • Thanked: 7 times
  • Eschew obfuscation
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #83 on: August 26, 2019, 12:27:36 pm »
What did Wonder Woman say? :peepwall:
Let’s just say that there are days when Wonder Woman says a lot and days, sometimes weeks, when she is silent...... I got to do a lot of thinking on those quiet days following my awesome discovery.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Pro
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
1150 GS, 1200 GSA, 125 KX, WR450  (all sold) :(
XT660Z
 
The following users thanked this post: BigEd

Offline Offshore

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #84 on: August 26, 2019, 12:48:35 pm »
So, how did you get Home, SSWFP on table or Table on SSWFP? Thanks for sharing, cool write up. :thumleft:
 

Offline BigEd

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: NER-A-CAR
    Location: Western Cape
  • Posts: 1,691
  • Thanked: 23 times
  • Panorama, Cape Town
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #85 on: August 26, 2019, 02:50:25 pm »
What did Wonder Woman say? :peepwall:
Let’s just say that there are days when Wonder Woman says a lot and days, sometimes weeks, when she is silent...... I got to do a lot of thinking on those quiet days following my awesome discovery.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Pro

 :imaposer: :imaposer: :imaposer:
81 XT500 (sold) 82 GPZ550 (sold)
04 XL650V Transalp (sold) 01 XL1000V Varadero (sold)
88 DR750s Dr Big (sold) 01 R1150GS BMW (sold)
84 XT600 Tenere 34L (sold)
?? Trek 6000 flippen martelpyp (current)
 

Online lpj

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: KTM 950 Adventure
    Location: Western Cape
  • Posts: 972
  • Thanked: 18 times
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #86 on: August 26, 2019, 03:04:43 pm »
sub :sip:
 

Offline silvrav

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: AJS (all models)
    Location: New Zealand
  • Posts: 4,454
  • Thanked: 73 times
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #87 on: August 26, 2019, 10:20:58 pm »
 :biggrin: ;D Noice! Busy catching up but I might come visit one day when I am accross the pond again @BOZO
 

Offline BOZO

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: Yamaha XT 660 Z
    Location: Australia
  • Posts: 643
  • Thanked: 7 times
  • Eschew obfuscation
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #88 on: August 26, 2019, 11:33:10 pm »
So, how did you get Home, SSWFP on table or Table on SSWFP? Thanks for sharing, cool write up. :thumleft:
One of the blessings of having 2 kids and a small car when you start out in life is you become a master at 3d Tetris. An additional benefit is knowing how to sneak a quick one while they are picking up a scattered  box of  smarties.
I summoned both of those skills on this occasion. While doing a slow drive by I did the mental calculations to see how it would get it into SSWFP, including stopping angle, stopping time and external influences.
I waited for a distraction in the from of the bus arriving and pounced on the opportunity like a fat kid on a kfc nugget bucket. Getting it in was easy.... getting it out was a different story all together. The burning eyeballs from wonder woman diddent help alot either.  O0
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
1150 GS, 1200 GSA, 125 KX, WR450  (all sold) :(
XT660Z
 

Offline BOZO

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: Yamaha XT 660 Z
    Location: Australia
  • Posts: 643
  • Thanked: 7 times
  • Eschew obfuscation
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #89 on: August 26, 2019, 11:34:58 pm »
:biggrin: ;D Noice! Busy catching up but I might come visit one day when I am accross the pond again @BOZO
COOL, / "sweet as" common lingo here..  :biggrin:
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
1150 GS, 1200 GSA, 125 KX, WR450  (all sold) :(
XT660Z
 

Offline BOZO

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: Yamaha XT 660 Z
    Location: Australia
  • Posts: 643
  • Thanked: 7 times
  • Eschew obfuscation
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #90 on: August 27, 2019, 11:58:23 pm »
Well I suppose that writing a story about picking up somebody else’s rubbish can only be so interesting.
Moving along swiftly to other topics, with no place in this thread. In fact these topics are more of a bar counter story. It’s a pointless story, its a space filler really, its used to belittle one person or a group of people that have made bad decisions in life according to the general populace that are in earshot, (in this case on paper/screen). For all the sensitive (slow 😊) people out there that need it to be spelt out for them its tongue in cheek .
Today my topic relates to Car Makers from the land of bagels and frogs legs and how I have sleepless nights about them.

Something important you should know is that my office is close to the Australian Synchrotron.
Here is a picture of the building.


Very nice hey?
Don’t be expecting to see one in South Africa soon.. the building I’m talking about.
Now I’m sure that you are wondering why this building and french cars keep me awake at night.
Have you seen “The Flash”? With Barry Allan? No…..well I’m not worried about wearing a ridiculous leather Suit and Being the fastest man on earth, what I’m worried about is the MetaHumans that Wonder Woman, Spiderpig, Trento123 (I was shamelessly plugging his YouTube channel) and I (the great island thinker) (the GIT) will have to fight when this breaks when the 50 year storm hits us. (according to the news that's almost every time it rains here, which is alot)

****** GEEK PART **************

Which raises a pertinent and obvious question: what does it actually do?
Technically speaking, a synchrotron is a large machine that accelerates electrons to almost the speed of light.
As those electrons are deflected through magnetic fields they create extremely bright light, meaning a synchrotron is also a “light source”.
Synchrotron light (X-rays and infrared light) is a million times brighter than the sun.

****** GEEK PART OVER*******

This is very similar to the large hadron collider.

***GEEK ON***
The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) is the world's largest and most powerful particle collider, the largest, most complex experimental facility ever built, and the largest single machine in the world.
One hundred meters underground, beneath the border between France and Switzerland, there's a circular machine that might reveal to us the secrets of the universe. Or, according to some people, it could destroy all life on Earth instead. One way or another, it's the world's largest machine and it will examine the universe's tiniest particles. It's the Large Hadron Collider (LHC).
http://science.howstuffworks.com/science-vs-myth/everyday-myths/large-hadron-collider.htm
****GEEK OFF****


SO WHY OH WHY do we have this science lesson?
Well its easy. Really….
The multi-billion-dollar project near Geneva in Switzerland, designed to smash sub-atomic particles at close to the speed of light, unexpectedly lost power a day ago (2016), despite a series of sophisticated safeguards.
Now that we have all the facts let put this all together and find out why the GIT is kept awake at night.
The large hadron collider (lets call it the big ring thing) is built in France and Switzerland.
France and Switzerland Manufacture Cars.
Volvo’s come from Switzerland. Volvos are KAK.
Renaults come from France. And EVERYBODY knows how kak Renaults are.
And just like the big ring thing that just randomly loses power endangering life in earth as we know it. Volvos and Renaults are the same. 
After you (and you know who you are) buy one you are trapped for life. There is no getting out of being locked in with the problem of owning one or having owned one.
You will always be known as the person that owned a Renault.  :P
It like stubbing your toe on a table at 2:00 in the morning and not being able to tell anyone.
Or running barefoot over a field of lego over and over and over again… .only worse. Much worse. So bad….. REALLY BAD.
Just like Barry Allan from “the flash”, mentioned earlier in the story, you may be, or think that you are “the flash” but are you really going to chill on the beach with your mates in that hot gimp leather suit?

Here we have the Australian Synchrotron (smaller big ring thing), Which is similer to the big ring thing with its own unique dangers and issues that threaten the existence of humanity.
The pressing question that keeps The GIT (me) awake at night is this…..
What if there is a Renault mechanic working at the Australian Synchrotron? 
Whats the reliability of the casing that holds the particle that burns 1 000 000 times brighter than the sun like?
When I'm sucked into the black hole can I take photos?  :imaposer:
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
1150 GS, 1200 GSA, 125 KX, WR450  (all sold) :(
XT660Z
 

Offline TeeJay

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #91 on: August 28, 2019, 05:41:25 am »
Yussus Bru - what an imagination you have  :imaposer:
Eat life!
 

Offline BigEd

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: NER-A-CAR
    Location: Western Cape
  • Posts: 1,691
  • Thanked: 23 times
  • Panorama, Cape Town
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #92 on: August 28, 2019, 08:12:32 am »
Yussus Bru - what an imagination you have  :imaposer:

+1 or is it +1111  :imaposer: :imaposer: :imaposer:
81 XT500 (sold) 82 GPZ550 (sold)
04 XL650V Transalp (sold) 01 XL1000V Varadero (sold)
88 DR750s Dr Big (sold) 01 R1150GS BMW (sold)
84 XT600 Tenere 34L (sold)
?? Trek 6000 flippen martelpyp (current)
 

Offline OomD

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #93 on: August 28, 2019, 09:11:30 am »
Yussus Bru - what an imagination you have  :imaposer:

+1 or is it +1111  :imaposer: :imaposer: :imaposer:
+1111, I'd imagine. :imaposer:
 

Offline roxenz

  • rocks make sense
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: Yamaha Super Tenere
    Location: Gauteng
  • Posts: 4,328
  • Thanked: 63 times
  • cheerful yesterdays and confident tomorrows
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #94 on: August 28, 2019, 09:54:27 am »
When I'm sucked into the black hole can I take photos?  :imaposer:
I asked on your behalf and got this answer:

"Dear GIT
Yes, you may take photos. But you won't be able to email or whatsapp them.
regards,
TFSM.
PS. Stop making fun of my creations. I'm watching you."

Hope that helps...
 

Offline Offshore

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #95 on: August 28, 2019, 09:56:55 pm »
So, how did you get Home, SSWFP on table or Table on SSWFP? Thanks for sharing, cool write up. :thumleft:
One of the blessings of having 2 kids and a small car when you start out in life is you become a master at 3d Tetris. An additional benefit is knowing how to sneak a quick one while they are picking up a scattered  box of  smarties.
I summoned both of those skills on this occasion. While doing a slow drive by I did the mental calculations to see how it would get it into SSWFP, including stopping angle, stopping time and external influences.
I waited for a distraction in the from of the bus arriving and pounced on the opportunity like a fat kid on a kfc nugget bucket. Getting it in was easy.... getting it out was a different story all together. The burning eyeballs from wonder woman diddent help alot either.  O0
You are Kakfunny, and Spiderpig is definatly related to you judging by your Profile Pic. :thumleft:
 

Offline BOZO

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: Yamaha XT 660 Z
    Location: Australia
  • Posts: 643
  • Thanked: 7 times
  • Eschew obfuscation
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #96 on: August 30, 2019, 12:57:03 am »
 :laughing4: funny Wonder woman tends to agree with you.....
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
1150 GS, 1200 GSA, 125 KX, WR450  (all sold) :(
XT660Z
 

Offline BOZO

  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Bike: Yamaha XT 660 Z
    Location: Australia
  • Posts: 643
  • Thanked: 7 times
  • Eschew obfuscation
Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #97 on: August 30, 2019, 01:12:15 am »
Hello all,
This update comes with a no satisfaction guaranteed notice. Unlike insurance companies and banks I like to put my disclaimer first.

Let your eyes and brains collect and interpret these shapes called “letters” that are organized in specific patterns, that form “words”, that are organized yet again by patterns and order to form “sentences”.
These sentences are used to “communicate”. Communicating is tantamount to the human race. If you are dedicated enough you could use these “sentences, words and letters” and play with the order even more to evoke a human reaction called emotion, this emotion, when evoked correctly, can then be used to make human faces change. You can make them smile, cry and laugh, but that’s really for the professionals, and the great writers out there. All I can do is make people squint.
By making the font really small. Like this (if you are squinting then I have achieved my goal. Sometimes I think the hieroglyphics make more sense than letters. You see a horse you draw a horse.)

Anyway, it’s been a while so grab a coffee and find comfortable spot.
You may be reading this on your phone or ipad. This probably means that you should remember that sitting on a toilet seat for too long can have far worse effects than the deep vein thrombosis brought on by international flights. To eliminate this problem, I find that one simple exercise can easily sort that out. 
It’s called the “curved crunchy spine, elongating your back as straight as a broom stick and then collapsing like a hot air balloon crash landing in the Serengeti” move.
You get to work out the cricks in your spine and get a satisfying “ploop” sound. If one was so inclined and inquisitive enough (and you all are) and you sneak a quick peek, on a really good day you get a perfectly formed “Mr Whippy”.  Go on check……..LOL…..That reminds me of a very funny mail I received a couple of years ago about different poops and the names you can give them…. Will have to scratch around for that one.
There are 2 specific things I wanted to chat about today. One of them as per usual is an experience on the island and the other is a more serious matter experienced on the island. Not all experiences are fun, but when you are telling other people about them you can make it fun. Like being interrupted on the toilet by the maid with your hand in your pants. This can be a huge embarrassment or alternatively be turned into one of life’s valuable lessons. Where everyone can learn.  So let’s look at the example above.
Note to self… always lock the bathroom door.
Note to maid…. Always knock before entering the bathroom.
Note to self….. this will make a very funny story around a bar counter one day.
Note to self….. after telling this story people don’t really want to shake your hand anymore…
See EVERYONE can learn from this… :pot:
When we originally started looking to expand our worlds view and venture to the island we put out our feelers out to attempt to understand the cost of living and how things work here.
Firstly getting hold of a South African in Australia is not difficult. There are so many of them that they are like the yellow jelly babies in a sweet packet. When you reach in you know you are going to get one but are you sure you want it?
Now don’t get me wrong. It’s awesome finding a South African on the island, but not as awesome as actually being in South Africa and going to Hooters***** having countless 1L “big daddy” Castle draughts, boneless chicken wings and tatoe’ tots. 
**Personal HiJACK ON**A place of tranquillity, where you can discuss the meaning of life and other unspeakable matters such as politics, bikes and sex. In this temple of solace, advice offered around the table is freely given to one and all, and as the afternoon turns into night, the burden of advice, both giving and receiving, becomes a heavy load to bear, both physically and mentally, as a coping mechanism more beer is needed to assist in absorbing these wise words that are offered. On many occasion I myself have also offered advice to a willing and sometimes unwilling ear, a side effect of this is that it lightens the burden of having all this knowledge to share. If this is done correctly (sharing and receiving of opinions) people will elevate their feelings and viewpoints of you and hold you in high regard, done incorrectly and they will think you are a pompous self-opinionated narcissistic asshat. (I’m pretty sure I quite easily fall into the second part, besides there is no “I” in team but there are five in “narcissistic personality disorder”) . Which actually brings me full circle to what I was trying to tell you. **Personal HiJACK OFF**
Calling a South African in Australia and asking for advice needs some consideration. Firstly, That South African needs to be new in the country and still converting to Rands in their minds.  If this is not the case take everything they say and multiply it by 10.
Asking a Question like how much is petrol? Will give you an answer along the lines of, it varies, to it depends where you buy it. And it will also depend on where that person lives.
Now we (South Africans) are used to the government regulating the petrol price and there is no competition. Well here it a little different.
Petrol is a different price EVERYWHERE…..  and everybody sells it.
Coles, Woolworths, Engine, Caltex, Shell the list goes on and on and on…….. actually, I think that there may be only 1 more.
They each have own prices and they have their own specials, but, Coles which happens to be close to home sells one litre of petrol for $1.08 (at the time of going to print) and around the corner from them another Coles is selling it for $1.12
Right so now that we all understand how that works, we have found the cheapest spot to buy fuel, we can move on with life. WAIT….. you forgot….. this is the island, this is the place where nothing makes sense but everything works and Tuesdays are just another day.  Without warning the price will drop, slowly, and the prices at the shop change randomly, so the cheapest spot is no longer the cheapest spot. And then BOOM the price goes up.
I’m not talking a trivially little 1 or 2 cents . I’m talking 30% up. Overnight.  Check the graphs below to show you how it works. And that my friends is why you can’t get a straight answer for “how much does petrol cost.”

Melbourne
 

Perth
 

Anyway if the petrol price variation is used as an indicator to the answers you receive from Aussies, then only ask questions to Aussies that live in Perth on Fridays.  < I know right!!! that makes no sense at all.. :dousing:
Wonder Woman and I decided that it was time to get our island style driving license as its used for everything here. I was tired of carrying round 200 documents proving who I was and where I live. (clearly the legend of the GIT has not spread as far as I thought) (don’t worry about my feelings, my narcissism has already patted me on the back for a job well done).
Being well versed in dealing with the locals back home we assumed that this was going to be a mission of note. You know how it works, being sent from counter to counter, like a cat trying to catch a red dot from a laser pointer.  We prepared ourselves mentally and physically for the struggle. I plucked up the courage and dialled the number to make an appointment. (that’s the mental part) wonder woman passed me the Credit Card (the physical part) and made an appointment. We were set for Monday 14:20 and 14:45. Ya Right 25 minutes…… suuuuurrrreee
Monday morning came along all to quickly, I warned Spiderpig and trento123 that Monday evening may be a tough one as we were off to deal with the island bureaucrats and their Germanic influenced “I only vant tooo heer vone clik”  ness.
We left a good hour before the time to be sure that we would be able to find parking and make sure that we were in the correct place and all. Also to be sure that we were close to the front of the line when our appointment time comes up. We found the building with relative ease, it was new, air-conditioned, with a good functional layout. As you walk in the door there is a friendly lady standing there, no Germanic accent but more of a Aussie/Chinese accent “oh hero maate, and hoowww are you going te daaay, Wothca be needing te do heeeer”  (a Chinese Aussie accent is actually a very difficult accent to type). Anyway after a few what? Excuse me? What? backwards and forwards, she prints out a ticket with a number, lets us through and shows us where to sit. As I said earlier functional. Shaped in a U with about 25 counters, TV screens for entertainment and progress of the tickets. Now being there early (someone’s got OCD….hint, not me, additional free hint, her nick name is wonder woman) you get to see how stuff works. People walk in and sit down waiting for their number to be called. “BING” number “AS0201 counter 14 please” you walk up had over your stuff and within 5 minutes done. All very friendly and simple. All handled at one counter, no “please go to counter 3 to pay then counter 5 to present the proof of payment then pass counter 8 to pay the bribe”.
I did not see one person wait for longer than 10 minutes, well except us of course. Eventually at 14:15 the lady in the front walked up to us and said “ hereeo mate you been ghelped yet” (still not an easy accent to type)… at 14:20 Wonder Woman’s name was called and off she went, happy days all sorted in 5 minutes. I was next. I got a short rotund East German retiree with a god complex and bad eyesight….
“ Soo you vant to geet a Veec Drivers liiiicense ghey…..mate?” (picture an irritated German trying desperately to keep his German accent but has lost the fight and now its German mixed with an Aussie accent.)
Please try to remember that just because the building is nice, it doesn’t mean the job is fun and the people have happy pills in their asses. Maby it just me and my sunny disposition but I always seem to get the bad apple.
After some back and forth that I want my drivers and bike license and his reluctance to understand my perfectly normal “straight outta benoni eccent” we eventually got to me taking whatever was on offer.
We paid what could be equated to a bond payment on a house in Rosebank for a license that is valid for the next 3 years with the assurance that we will never have to go back there as from now on its all online. BOOM BABY. Happiness comes at a price…
All very chuffed with ourselves we went home to celebrate where we shared a packed of chips and a glass of wine. Being bigger and stronger than the rest of the family I got 2 extra chips and when Wonder Woman was not looking I took an extra sip of wine from our shared glass.
If you would like to complain, give compliments or even share your opinion with me (we all understand the burden of being wise) please feel free to call. But before you do please take note of the following.
One subscriber told the Sunday Times that a call to Australia that used to cost R0.72 per minute had increased to R20.11 per minute – a 2,693% increase.
http://mybroadband.co.za/news/telecoms/175791-why-telkom-hiked-an-overseas-call-rate-by-2600.html
This doesn’t mean that you opinion is 2693% better than mine. ?? :deal:
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
1150 GS, 1200 GSA, 125 KX, WR450  (all sold) :(
XT660Z
 
The following users thanked this post: BigEd

Offline TeeJay

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #98 on: August 30, 2019, 05:48:30 am »
 :imaposer: :imaposer: :imaposer:
Eat life!
 

Offline Buff

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! It’s the catchup thread.
« Reply #99 on: August 30, 2019, 07:09:42 am »
 :laughing4: :imaposer: I do believe you have missed your calling in life  ;D
Present bikes: BETA 300RR, KTM 690, Yamaha WR250F

If you're dumb you gotta be tough !!!