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Author Topic: Australia.... The Island Saga  (Read 38101 times)

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Offline IanTheTooth

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #400 on: February 04, 2020, 02:08:59 am »
You've got something there Bozo. I've just bought a second one mainly for my wife and also for something smaller to use on tracks and getting through unmade creek crossings but it really isn't the same. It is cheaper to rego as a solo ($320 a year) and there are quite a few low mileage bikes at a reasonable price which have been sitting in garages but you are right. It's not the same.
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Offline Takashi

Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #401 on: February 04, 2020, 07:54:58 am »
Only thing is, I don't think I would buy a bike here. Its just not the same.

but you are right. It's not the same.

Care to elaborate on these two statements?

Is it because of the lack of riders sharing a similar mindset or the areas you ride?
 

Offline ChrisL - DUSTRIDERS

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #402 on: February 04, 2020, 10:16:47 am »
Only thing is, I don't think I would buy a bike here. Its just not the same.

but you are right. It's not the same.

Care to elaborate on these two statements?

Is it because of the lack of riders sharing a similar mindset or the areas you ride?
I have pondered about the "it's not the same" ending and wondered could it possibly be not the same as in South Africa?
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #403 on: February 04, 2020, 11:16:51 pm »
Good question, and its hard to explain why its not the same. For me I think its got to do with a number of things.
Firstly I think the biggest issue is the speed limit, I know it sounds stupid to say without some perspective so let me put it this way.
You have planned a weekend away to Dullstroom and you live in centurion. Imagine driving the from centurion all the way to Witbank at 80Km/h and then being able to open up the taps and let those horses free right up until 110km/h only to have to reign your steed back in after 20km because there is a town ahead and you need to go 60km/h….

Secondly, and this again is a personal thing, when I did my first trip in to the alpine national forest I was all gung ho, bear grilles would have been proud of the size of my kahoonas. My previous trips that I have done have all be adventures over borders, sleeping on the side of the road, eating dodge food and drinking beer at a shabeen, you know all the good stuff. When I met a fellow biker at the Dargo pub and I told him my route, he shat little possum pellets and told me I was mad. “Did I understand the danger that I was placing myself in? Did I have a sat Phone?” Then when I got home I got the same lecture from Wonder Woman. That little bit if excitement of the unknown was also taken away.

Third, and I know it me, but I really struggle to find a group, person, that I can ride with, they either want to go 40km then stop for coffee, or ride 600km for the day.

I have wondered about betting a plastic but it’s not worth it here (VIC), I would need to trailer the bike 2 to 3 hours out of town before I could find the first available place to ride.

Having said all of that I’m not sure if it’s all of those, a combination of them or just one single thing that I cant pin point. I did a trip round Tazzie and it felt better, it felt more like it used to.

So Ya, Its not the same…
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Offline ChrisL - DUSTRIDERS

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #404 on: February 04, 2020, 11:54:39 pm »
I met a Aussie in Namibia once on a bike trip. He has a couple of big bikes like GSA and Ducatti's.
He ask me to imagine to ride a 1200 at 100 kph for a day or days on end!! He said it's not even good for the gearbox to keep it in sixth at that speed.
Next day I tried it, I kept at it for 15 very long minutes and kept my bike in 5th. 120 feels soooo much better.

Yes it will not be the same...
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Offline IanTheTooth

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #405 on: February 05, 2020, 04:40:06 am »
What Bozo said, also most land here is in private hands so even though there are common droving paths the landowners are a bit sniffy about finding you on them. My son is going to collect the firearms from a farmer who has been brandishing his rifle at people swimming in the creek next to his smallholding. They can be very possessive over their little bit of Australia.
« Last Edit: February 05, 2020, 04:43:52 am by IanTheTooth »
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Offline IanTheTooth

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #406 on: February 07, 2020, 01:52:37 am »
Only in Australia!

The government has copped a lot of flak over the state sponsored national internet roll out called NBN which is running slower than anticipated and if they are using stuff like this I am not surprised!
« Last Edit: February 07, 2020, 01:53:45 am by IanTheTooth »
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #407 on: February 07, 2020, 05:54:03 am »
 :laughing4: :laughing4:
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #408 on: February 07, 2020, 06:06:07 am »
Hi All, thanks for reading my stories about the island. I'm away for a little bit but I thought I would just leave this one here for the weekend.
Over Christmas we went down to a place called Wilsons Promontory National Park. It’s probably as far south as you can go in Australia. As a destination, its popular for alot of people holding a 457 visa and not so much for the citizens. Our neighbours were fresh out of Monty Casino and there was plenty of nodding while talking going on. We camped for a couple of days and if you have ever camped before you will know that there are good parts to camping and bad parts, the good parts are the conversations, the laughs, the preparing of food and the outdoors-y-ness of it all. The bad part are the shared toilets, noisy neighbours and the packing up. For me I like the part that when the sun is up or down its beer o’clock. You just reach into the esky and grab an ice-cold tin of amber brew. Slot it into a stubby holder and chill. Keeping bottled chicken cool is top priority and a job that I take very seriously, so on day one I decided that I would walk up to the shop and buy a bag of ice, clearly, I had not taken into account that walking a kilometre and back in 28 degrees would not only melt the $5 bag of ice but it would also elongate my arms by an extra 10cm. So the next day I loaded Trenticles onto the bakkie that we borrowed and off we went to buy more frozen water. When I parked in the car park I looked at the silver jeep parked next to us and I said to Trenticles.
“It takes a special kind of twatwaffle to do that to his mode of transport. Low profiles are nice on a GTI or a Ferrari, or a Lamborghini, low profiles on a Jeep compass is just plain dof.”
 
Normally I would not have shared this story but when certain events happen so close together I cant help but feel the need for you to be brought up to speed with the type of Muppets that we are forced to breath air with here on the island. Trenticles went all gangster on me and used words like sick, yo, skirt skirt, foshizzel and crackin.
He said “yo bra, thats sick, he must look foshizzel getting round in that skirt skirt and the sound must be crackin”
Being the cool dad, I was into it and was agreeing with him. I said “yo man, that dude must be wearing a skirt, he also needs a shovel to bury his sick head after he gets a good crackin”
I assumed from the look I got from Trenticles that something was lost in translation.  Anyway, I forgot about it until today when outside my office I saw this………WTF!!! Makes me think of Mike Tyson, his first night in jail, on all fours in the bathroom, covered in gold glitter. A world Champion Boxer that’s lost the plot.
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #409 on: February 07, 2020, 06:13:54 am »
Anyway this kicked of a discussion with Trenticles about nice things, and he was like “I’m not really into clothes and stuff but its nice to have sharp threads and feel smart, and, you know that name brand stuff is good quality, and, that its worth spending the extra Dollars.”
This was coming from a 15-year-old Neanderthal that can’t lift his feet when he walks and has the ability to turn a brand new pair of takkies from shiny and new to tattered rags in a matter of weeks. I’ve seen a hessian bag full of biltong being mauled by Pitbulls last longer than shoes on that boy. Then to make matters worse the knuckle dragging Teenager goes out and buys a white tee-shirt and jacket with his Xmas money, which can attract dirt like a tesla coil shooting lightning in a faraday cage. Who, I ask you is going to keep that clean? Obviously not the person that’s wearing it!  They, these garments from hell, have some fancy smancy name and I’m sure if you looked close enough at the label there is a tag that says, “you have just been ripped off, smile dumbass”.
But, who am I to judge? What does my opinion count in these matters? It’s no secret that I have no sense of colour coding and the process of getting dressed involves taking from the top of the pile. I learnt my fashion sense parrot style.
•   You can wear black with any colour just not another black
•   Wearing slippers or going to the shops bare feet is not ok
•   Shorts with holes where your plumbs hang out are for home use only
•   Free balling is not permitted when visiting friends or going to work
•   Shirts tucked in tee shirts hang out
•   Answering “Yes” to “Are you really going to wear that?” is incorrect.

I won’t harp on the fact that I permanently hear how broke the poor little swine is, and that he just doesn’t have nice things, but, watch him order the whole left side of the menu at Maccas and then gulp down 20 litres of Slush puppies from seven eleven and then ask him what he did with his cash and you get the standard “eish angas” answer, followed shortly by the cupped hand waiting for me to cross his palm with gold, again. I suppose the concept of money is still a mystery to this generation of youth, apparently if you want money and nice things, you just have to dream about it and it happens. This dream can apparently come to fruition, because, at the ripe old age of 15 you are clearly entitled to the entire salary that both parents earn, should that not be enough, questions about parental career choice and changing to a job that pays more are not uncommon.
“If Jimmy boy down the road has $2000 takkies why can’t I have them aswell?”
The island has this stupid rule that prohibits shortening the lifespan of 15 year old’s so I had to take a different route. I can’t start to argue about clothes as its difficult (for me) to draw parallels on a cost to benefit ratio so I clenched my teeth and waited for my opportunity.  I didn’t have to wait long. The subjects of “why don’t you drive the Lexus, and why don’t we have a boat? Came up. Two more of my favourite topics including REANLUT’s, Landrovers and parking ticket officials.
The Lexus is easy but I decided to go with a boat story.
Boats are expensive toys that are great for burning cash. If you are sitting on a pile of it and want to get rid of it, buy a boat.
Here is a little breakdown of how to do it
When buying a boat there is no point in buying a ‘Tinny’ although it floats and is made of steel, you are not going to get any complements from young blonds on the prowl. Remember that if you have a nice boat you will automatically have more friends so it needs to seat a fair amount of “Friends”
I did a quick search for “What boat do I buy to show everyone I have money to burn and no personality?”
Google returned exactly the information I was looking for. A “Force 26 Cross Over”.
It seats 12 people so there is lots of space for your new “friends”. In the advert it has young skinny smiling people, they are in the prime of their lives and clearly loving the experience, in reality you know that at least 60% to 80% of your new mates are going to be old and wrinkled, some will have false teeth, and most will be 3 shit’s behind so you will need some serous pulling power, especially if you want to drag some miserable twit balancing on a plank behind you, this boat solves that problem as well and is equipped with a Mercury Verado 400R.
With the boat and motor selected let’s get down to the nitty gritty. 
Boat and Engine $ 168 000 *
Trailer $ 22 110 *
(*yes that’s correct it’s a number Zuma cannot pronounce if I put it in Rands)
You will need a car to move this monstrosity from dam to dam weighing in at just under 3 tonnes its pretty heavy, so a battery powered Lexus in not going to cut it, you will also need to get there so RENAULTS and Landrovers are also out. A Landcruiser would be top choice. A good second hand one is easy to find and you can look at spending $ 50 000 for a REALLY GOOD one.
Ok so we are set now.
Total spend so far we are sitting on $ 240 110.00* I have not mentioned insurance, Rego, services etc etc. and we still have not put this in the water. Anyway, call your friends and fill the esky it’s party time. Oh wait, stop, stop! it needs fuel. Lucky there is a petrol station at the dock and you can fill up there, it’s a 300 litre tank so plan carefully, 300 takes a while to fill. Fuel at $ 1.35/l will set you back a mere $ 405. Quick convert to Rands at current rates. R4550.00 *eish*
OK NOW we can hit the water. All 12 ageing fat friends brimming with excitement and cholesterol get on the 7.7 meter boat, you mash the accelerator and there is no conversation, there is only streaked tears sliding across their faces as you show everyone just how amazing your toy is, revving the engine at 7000rpm, you are doing 107kph, and consuming 145 litres/hour. When you eventually stop and turn around the woman are cradling their boobs to stop them from being ripped off in the bumps, there is the occasional grunt and groan from the men and one happy smiling face…..yours! You wait patiently for everyone to rehydrate their eyeballs by pouring beer into them and you realize that it time to turn back, as you are almost out of fuel and its time refill.
Lucky this will never happen in on the island as there is probably some speed limit on water where you can only do 25km/h. ahhhhh this blisss!!! Bet you are happy you own a boat now you poephol.
AANNNYYYYYYYWAY I digress, back to cost to benefit ratio.
Armed with these facts and what I thought was a well thought out thorough argument, I sat Trenticles down and said something along the lines of:
“If you have a boat and drive it around a dam in a clockwise direction, which is all you can do, you are going to get red eyes, sea sick, cover 200km or a couple of laps and spend $ 400.
This results in additional labour getting to the destination, launching etc, and a smaller pile of cash.”
He blinked, I continued.
“If you took that same $400 and put it in the battery powered Lexus you can cover 4300km your journey starts when you turn the key and ends when you feel like it. If you took that same $400 and put it into the Yamaha, you could do 5400km. Journey starts when you turn the key and every km covered is exciting and fun. These distances could take you into the outback, through mountains, into deserts and even to a place with warm water where you can take $5 blowup lilo and soak up the suns life giving rays.”
His eyes glazed over, his head dropped slowly and I could see that I had lost him.
I suppose the PowerPoint I created in anticipation of this event was overkill but hey what if it had worked? What if I had broken through, then you all would have been calling me for my PowerPoint and my research. In anticipation of you flooding my inbox with requests I have decided that I will share some of these insights I uncovered.
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #410 on: February 07, 2020, 06:17:45 am »
image one
As you can see the blue line is the best line and that’s the one you want. The grey line is how to burn a pile of cash quickly.
Moral of the story? There is none, there is only teenager’s vs parents. In our lives there is a span of time that needs to pass, so that when the teenagers turn 18 you can smile and wave as you close the door and call the locksmith.
Until then use something simple to explain cost benefit ratio. For example, when I pay the bills things work, when I don’t they stop. Or one that is available on tap, like, when your attitude sucks things stop working for you like the internet. Using a simple graphic like this also helps. 😊

Image2
When the whining starts to reach a crescendo about how unfair life is, no need to go hoarse engaging in a pointless argument, just keep it simple and switch to the next image while nodding your head.
My personal favroute.
Image3
Yes I know, it doesn't always stop the fight or the sulks, but there is a certain degree of satisfaction derived from watching a confused Aussie Teenager trying to understand how a PowerPoint is used as a visual aid in an argument.
Try it next time, start with your better half and utilize PowerPoint to kill an argument and I suppose any chance of romance…..
Till next time.
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
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Offline BigEd

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #411 on: February 07, 2020, 08:31:44 am »
Friday morning sorted....fanks!  :thumleft:
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #412 on: February 09, 2020, 11:58:28 pm »
Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
I realize that there are few people here that actually like boats and even own them.
Add to that, that we live in a world of super sensitivity where, having an opinion or, god forbid, poking a bit of fun at someones hobby, passion, makes people shit kittens.
....
Brace yourself, because here it comes.
......
I'm sorry.....
also.....



I'm not sorry, if you want an apology bring a slab of beer to my house and lets have a beer and see how we can toughen you up by looking at life from outside the box. ;D
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #413 on: February 10, 2020, 12:14:34 am »
Yesterday there was a charity cricket match in Melbourne to raise funds for the bushfire crisis.
It was entertaining to watch, with some cricket legends showing that they still have the goods.
Its amazing to see that in 20 overs. (10 a side) that they could raise so much money.  :thumleft:
I may just still be a bit cynical but i would love to see how much of that actually reaches the people and communities that need it.

Bushfire Cricket Bash legends match raises $7.7m
Ponting XI beats Gilchrist XI as legends turn it on, but real winners are those impacted by Australia's bushfires across a devastating summer

https://www.cricket.com.au/news/bushfire-bash-cricket-live-stream-ponting-xi-gilchrist-xi-sachin-tendulkar-how-to-watch-legends/2020-02-09
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
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Offline BOZO

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Re: Australia.... The Island Saga
« Reply #414 on: February 10, 2020, 10:30:09 pm »
So there I was, looking out of the window at the road wondering if anything interesting was going to transpire for the day. The highlights for the day included a warm westerly wind, or was it northerly, still have no idea which way north is in this place, that was trying to dislodge a lonely looking Magpie from its perch, I had 2:1 odds paying out that the wind would last longer than the Magpie. So ya it was a slow day… And then it happened…. My phone rang. The sharp repetitive sound driving me to nearly defenestrate it, but I held back and instead I looked at it with distain, firstly that would mean that I would need to talk to someone and if the magpie flew away while I was distracted I would miss the celebratory moment I had been waiting for, for five minutes.
That call set in motion a series of events that all started from a random request from a client on the other side of the ditch. I was sent there as I’m the go to guy for IT stuff on this island apparently. This place I went to is also an island well its actually split into 2 islands appropriately named north island and south island. It’s not tooo far away and it has people with accents easier to understand than say a refugee from Northern Sudan. This is probably due to the fact that they don’t talk through their nasal cavity like the Aussies. They also have a second language, possibly more, I don’t really know. This land of legends has given us great rugby players to watch and respect (real rugby not that namby pamby stuff the softies play) and was used to film most of the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy as well and the Hobbit.  I’m sure by now you will have guessed that I was sent to New Zealand for work not Tasmania nothing comes from Tasmania except cousins that marry each other. News Headline “The Git on the island gets flown to another island.”
Being a souf effrican we are not allowed to travel to New Zealand without asking for express permission, this asking does not come cheap and I had to fork out almost $200. The web site says that Visa approval takes approximately 20 -25 working days and if there are any issues you loose your money and you need apply again. Sounds fair……….Kinda…..  I applied online and uploaded all the required documents and paid the money, they stipulate that you need to send your passport to them which they will send back after charging you another $20.  I went to the post office and sent it using Australian post. That was the Monday. I assumed that this was the start and that I would hear from them in 20 – 25 days. The next Monday my passport was in the post-box. I assumed that there was an issue as there was no new stamps in it or any fancy stickers. Just before I picked up the phone to give them a call they informed me that my visa had been approved for one visit…..yes you read that correctly. I will have to go through this process every time I need to go to New Zillland. The good that comes from this story is how efficient they are, and the bad is the Fu#$#!!n Admin to get it.
Anyhoooooo moving along swiftly to something more interesting I have some stories I would like to share with you about New Zealand.
Firstly the accents are similar but different, it’s not like speaking to a Scotsman or a Welshmen where you just nod your head and sip your beer, its like speaking to an English South African from Ellisras, it’s there and you can understand them but somethings just not right.
So to put it simply, when speaking to someone from New Zealand you need to accentuate your “e”s to “I”s  drop the “a”s and change the “i”s to “o”s 
New Zealand would be pronounced "New Zilllind", and
Ten minutes” should sound like “teen meenuts.
“awesome” or “Auckland,” you say “oarsome” or “Oarkland.”
“Fish and chips” should sound like “fush and chups.”, and

“Can I have another beer please barman” will be “Kin I hev nuther biir pliz birmin”. 

The last phrase was easy to perfect after 5 beers and I decided that this was my preferred method of communication on my whirlwind tour of the islands.
For the Travellers out there I’m sure you will agree it doesn’t matter where in the world you are, all boardrooms look the same and the conversations are all the same.
One oke is talking, one oke is nodding, one oke is playing on his phone and another is fighting off the crippling sleeping effects of a PowerPoint while a small group are playing boardroom bingo.
I started off in Auckland aka “Oarkland” and drove north or south to Hamilton where I had my first encounter with a stacking parking lot. Ya that’s what I said. A stacking parking lot. I was told to reverse into the space provided and leave my keys at reception.
Now being a man this was obviously very easy for me but I can tell you if you don’t have a penis don’t bother trying to reverse park your car without assistance. (HEE HEE HEE head down to avoid flying objects)  :pot:
Anyway once its parked the car lifts up and other cars can park below it. Pretty cool stuff. After I reverse parked the Battlestar I needed beer.
So I trotted off to the nearest pub and tested out my new language skills. “Kin I hev nuther biir pliz birmin”.  He smiled and rewarded me with a pint of Hamilton’s finest imported Guinness, ahhh good times.
Whilst in Hamilton we were invited to dinner, there was some argy bargy between the sales guy and the customer about where to go and what to eat, the customer looked in my direction and said to the sales guy what do you think the Yaapie (NZ term for a South African)  wants to eat. I heard terms like Sashimi, Sushi, Chinese, Fish and Soup. It was time to jump in with my one third vote. “ I’m a meat and potatoes kind of guy” I added from the side. That comment was brushed off like a plea for sweets from a redheaded stepchild. There was a short debate and the decision was to do Japanese food. For the uneducated this is not like going to Spur, Burger King or Maccas, its apparently an eating experience. You are seated around a square table that has a big hot metal square plate in the middle. You have a chef that stands on the one side that cooks the food in front of you. Our Chef was freshly imported from Asia, I think someone else wrote his English test, he takes his position and pulls out his knife and spatula and begins the ceremony. There was a lot of swinging blades and spatulas some rat-a-tat-tat on the stove and some throwing of utensils in the sky. Our little ninja chef looked like he was attacking what could have been a swarm of invisible gogoa’s that were clearly going for his throat, the look of desperation in his face and the way he squinted all the time made me wonder if he was in an emotionally rewarding job or if he simply needed to go for a shit. Every now and again he would hit one of his imaginary bugs and chop it up on the hot plate. “Zing zing ting ting.” Some eye contact was made during the opening ritual and orders of unmentionable inedible things were placed.
While all of this was happening, I thought I had made a connection with him (the chef), with all the hand signals and the nodding and grinning going on. After all we have similar things in common, we are both from a distant land, we both speak a different language, he eats raw fish, I eat raw meat, and we both believe that a Toyota is better than a RENAULT.(can’t guarantee that last comment but I’m pretty sure it true.) Through this imagined connection I thought we had built, I felt I was in the zone to ask him something personal and deep. You know the kind of question that makes you sit back and think “Wow!!!! What a deep and personal question to be asked by a complete stranger, I think I may just have to answer that!” So, I formulated my question and was about to ask him
“How long did he have to train to become a Sashimi chef?”
At that point before I could utter a word, he took the onion tower he had been meticulously building in-between the ting-ting-zing-zing-knife-flip-spatula-tap-tap and poured some oil into it and lit the oil causing a small table sized atomic bomb with smoke billowing out in a mushroom cloud from the top of the onion tower.
I was like “FUCK!”. I was not expecting that!!!
His expression changed from squinty eyes to very squinty eyes and I assumed that this must be the penultimate display of his years of training in Ninja chef camp and the closing of the ritual before he actually got down to cooking some food.
My well thought out question was going to be brilliantly timed, the answer, no matter what, was going to be life changing. I was ready. I just had to wait for the last part of the shindy. We were at the crescendo when, with a pained expression on his face (more squinty eyes) he slowly lifted a wooden whistle to his lips and said “Rooook heeerrr a chooka train” and he pushed the burning onion tower across the hot plate and blew his wooden whistle “toot toot”……..
Disappointment is an emotion that can only be felt when you buy a RENAULT or when you travel to a distant land to watch a Sashimi chef make a burning steam train out of onion rings and blow a wooden whistle.
To say that my question was no longer important is an understatement, I had lost my will to connect with our chef and more importantly I had moved on to debating with myself how I was going to hide the scallops which are basically, big raw bulls eyes, swimming in a soup of congealed squid slime, mixed with the vomit and shit of a teething baby, in gravy. No matter how much ting-ting-zing-zing-walla-walla-ding-ding you add to that stuff it isn’t fit for human consumption. After I tasted the first one I was ill, and with the prospect of 3 more to get down I just have to say, I don’t often use malaphors but the thought of having to eat that had me sweating like a stuck pig.
I forced down the raw fish and the seaweed concoctions and silently prayed for death to take me sooner than later, my stomach was telling my throat and my lower intestine that one is going to have to open as it was not going to hold this “stuff” for much longer. Luckily brain power, sheer will power as well as gag reflex stopped the vomit from traveling back up my throat pipe and it made its way into what was hopefully my small intestine. All I had to do now was survive the 2 hour drive back to Oarkland.
AANNNNYYYYYYYHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
I Survived and I’m also pretty sure that I don’t like eating anything that swims in its own shit and piss.
I would rather take my chances with enterprise polony from Polokwane or Paw Paws from Griffith, NSW thank you very much.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2017%E2%80%9318_South_African_listeriosis_outbreak

I could say that is “never odd or even” or “Are we not drawn onward, we few, drawn onward to new era?” to end of this letter with a palindrome but instead I will end this off with a special note
« Last Edit: February 13, 2020, 07:31:54 am by BOZO »
"If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them."— Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping)
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Offline TeeJay

Re: Australia.... The Island Saga
« Reply #415 on: February 11, 2020, 09:48:27 am »
 :imaposer: :imaposer: :imaposer:
Ja/Nee
 

Offline BigEd

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Re: Australia.... The Island Saga
« Reply #416 on: February 11, 2020, 10:47:11 am »
...
I Survived and I’m also pretty sure that I don’t like eating anything that swims in its own shit and piss.
...

So, you don't eat fish then :pot: :peepwall:

 ;)

I have lived through one of these Jap eating functions before and I can relate, however, as a train nut I have never been so lucky to have a pile of onions steam training around. You should consider yourself lucky....in my world that is.... O0
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Offline big oil

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Re: Australia.... Not Another one! The Island Saga
« Reply #417 on: February 12, 2020, 06:08:51 am »
Taste  :laughing4: Naa Mate, just another pawn in the world of over priced tech.  8)

Anyhooo I'm back after a short sabbatical, We had Wonder Woman's sister visit us for 2 weeks.
So its been a busy time living the high life.
I will be writing about that experience soon enough.

How does she look?  Didja at least get a knob polish?  :peepwall: :pot:
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Prepare yourself for four more years 😎
 

Offline roxenz

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Re: Australia.... The Island Saga
« Reply #418 on: February 12, 2020, 04:31:35 pm »
You make the island sound like such fun, BOZO. Lots of characters wearing funny hats and large bulbous shoes. And propeller bowties. And now you have another two islands to play on!

As an aside, there's the story about the New Zillinder having a conversation with god, effusively thanking god for all the great things he blessed New Zillind with. You knows, clean oceans, Hollywood scenery, strong girls, the best rugby team in the world, etc, etc. At which point god smiled a little smile and said "before you get too carried away, wait until you see the bunch of eejits I have had delivered to the island next to you..."
 

Offline JMOL

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Re: Australia.... The Island Saga
« Reply #419 on: February 12, 2020, 05:17:27 pm »
 :sip:
Life is hard - even harder if you are stupid.