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Author Topic: A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt  (Read 999 times)

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Offline >Herman<

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« on: August 07, 2006, 11:32:56 am »
Firstly, I was not there.  This was written by a friend. Enjoy, and I for 1 can relate to his thoughts.  :wink:

PS: Sorry no pics, so don't ask for any!

As you may know your partner, Pop Eye, invited me out for a beginners, introductory enduro ride. Told me he had painstakinly researched the easiest beginners route, cos he likes me so much !

De Wildt, but very tame, he said ! Even took along a new 450 that needed nursing to run in. Ok so me, not too shabby a rider, did a little foot-ups a 100 yrs ago, armed with a road full face helmet, a summer mesh jacket, the latest off road pants , loaned knee pads , buzz light year G S boots and lots of false bravado sets off for a slow easy INTRODUCTORY lesson in enduro.

After stalling the bike 20 times and having to put it on its stand just to kick start it { no happy button for juniours} im off all goes well for 10 min.

Realy feeling good, my mate Pop Eye and my touring buddy Eugene would never let me get hurt , and Garth, he seems nice enough !

Suddenly we come to a stop and my mates all say  " just remmember, a little momentum " and before i can say four stroke , a mother of a hill, affectionately known as " long rocks " awaits. My buddies all disappear up and im left alone and afraid, so only one way and thats up !

Well i cant use bad language here but that hill taught me some new words, me and the bike were very rarely going in the same direction, it was a long and fierce battle. I still had to stop for 3 guys coming down, and i saw the fear in their eyes, and they were going down hill !

So i get to the top, pretty pleased with myself, still in one piece and my buddies have waited, so im not going to die alone in this god forsaken bush.Then im introduced to ' Mrs Piggy " a dirty bad tempered mother of a down hill, its not a ride, its a slide hope and pray and pray some more. Consider youself lucky if you and your bike arrive at the bottom in the same place and in one piece.

At this stage i realise a terrible truth, an undenyable reality, i know nothing about riding bikes ! I now hope my buddies will do the honourable thing and leave me to die quietly alone here in this terrible place.

They dont !
 
They take me to a spaza shop, feed me coke and chips and say nice things , like well done , the worst is over, and we will be home soon ! BLOODY LIERS!

I even try bribery, pay for all their cokes, smile a lot and tell them i feel realy close to them !

Its then i meet a friend, also at the shop, also riding with his mates, real mates !

I tell him its my first time, that my mates are taking me the easy way, and i explain about  long rocks and mrs piggy, and i see a strange look develope on his face before he doubles over in hysterical laughter, rushes over to his friends and they all stare at me with a mixture of admiration and pity, then theyall laugh again.They approach me and with serious faces advise me to find new riding buddies !

So now i know im in trouble, and when we hit the river bed i realise im on my own.But now im getting this shit, even enoying it, i realise i dont need to know anything, the bike knows, just open up and hang on , realy hang on !Its sand and rocks and shit everywhere, some rocks bigger than me but my bike aint fased, its going and i can go with if i want .

Man and do i wanna go with, throttle open, i swear and curse in my  helmet as i humiliate all before me , its a crazy high speed mixture of sand and rock and i love it.

Even the little wimp called coconuts is a laugh, i sail up, even passing Garth who is trying to convince his bike to go in the same direction as him.

All too soon we were back, loaded the bikes and i sat quietly on the tar and said thanks to the army of gaurdian angels that kept me safe !

To Eugene, Garth and especialy Stephen, thanks so much for a great days riding, honestly the most fun ive had on 2 wheels in ages.

Offline Lito

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #1 on: August 07, 2006, 11:45:46 am »
Whats a nivice?  :wink:  :wink:  :wink:  :wink:  :D
 

shark_za

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #2 on: August 07, 2006, 12:07:18 pm »
Well said !  

THE spot for Gauteng offroad riding.
Longrocks and Miss Piggy on his first ride, shame man !
 

Offline >Herman<

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #3 on: August 07, 2006, 12:16:27 pm »
Quote from: "Lito"
Whats a nivice?  :wink:  :wink:  :wink:  :wink:  :D


Somebody like me.... :oops:  :D  :D

Offline JourneyMan

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #4 on: August 07, 2006, 12:25:05 pm »
hehe.

Sure he's glad he did it in the end, even though he was bamboozled into the trip!
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Offline Groenie

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #5 on: August 07, 2006, 12:31:57 pm »
Ja, ek verstaan. Us novices do get "NIVICE' some times...
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Offline Maverick

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #6 on: August 07, 2006, 01:40:58 pm »
Well written, it does not need pics :D
Maverick Disclaimer: This thread is intended for the use of the individual(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this thread is not authorised (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas.
 

Offline X Banana Boy

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #7 on: August 07, 2006, 03:15:57 pm »
Eish, that is cruel.  Funny but cruel.
 

Offline BlouVark

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #8 on: August 07, 2006, 03:20:28 pm »
I like the way this guy tells a story :D

With that kind of friends he doesn't need enemies :shock:
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Offline Gnomad

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #9 on: August 07, 2006, 06:43:43 pm »
The going down is always worse than the going up!!

I've tested this theory sooooo many times myself. The worst was a trip on a snowmobile (how many of the SA guys have ever seen one of those  :lol:  ) on a hil that I barely made it over-on the trip back down I looked at the hill, more of a cliff really, with a 90?º left hander at the bottom and said no way. Took a while to find another way around. Taking a guy out on that kind of trip as a noob is cruel and uncalled for. Just the kind of thing riders do.....

 :)
 

Offline funacide

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #10 on: August 07, 2006, 10:23:49 pm »
Quote from: "shark_za"
Well said !  

THE spot for Gauteng offroad riding.
Longrocks and Miss Piggy on his first ride, shame man !


Saw this place (looked like an enduro track) near the quarry where we were playing this weekend there is a section of small soccer ball size rocks that looks to be about 100m long on a serious uphill.

Anyone want pointers let me know, I will gladly take you there and watch!!
 :twisted:  :twisted:
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Offline Welsh

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #11 on: August 07, 2006, 10:31:22 pm »
Quote from: "funacide"
Quote from: "shark_za"
Well said !  

THE spot for Gauteng offroad riding.
Longrocks and Miss Piggy on his first ride, shame man !


Saw this place (looked like an enduro track) near the quarry where we were playing this weekend there is a section of small soccer ball size rocks that looks to be about 100m long on a serious uphill.

Anyone want pointers let me know, I will gladly take you there and watch!!
 :twisted:  :twisted:


Pervert  :twisted:  :twisted:  :D

Welsh

And of course you can't forget Ian Healy's legendary comment which was picked up by the Channel 9 microphones when Arjuna Ranatunga called for a runner on a particularly hot night during a one dayer in Sydney... "You don't get a runner for being an overweight, unfit, fat c***!!!"
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Offline Gnomad

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A nivice's ride report on his experience at De Wildt
« Reply #12 on: August 08, 2006, 06:44:53 am »
Quote from: "funacide"
Quote from: "shark_za"
Well said !  

THE spot for Gauteng offroad riding.
Longrocks and Miss Piggy on his first ride, shame man !


Saw this place (looked like an enduro track) near the quarry where we were playing this weekend there is a section of small soccer ball size rocks that looks to be about 100m long on a serious uphill.

Anyone want pointers let me know, I will gladly take you there and watch!!
 :twisted:  :twisted:


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"no, but I'd do it on yours...    :D