Beemer man
Race Dog
Ok I posted this on another thread, but I had a whole lot of Dogs PM and asked make a new post coz they though a lot of people woluld not look at a technical thread, and they thought this was quite funny and needed to share it.
So just for you here it is now even more people can see what a D...s I made of Myself!! :biggrin:
Right so I have now have officially made a complete D...s of myself twice in public in the last couple of weeks!!
As you all know by now one of the services I offer is the repair of tappet covers on the beemers, now you also probably know that the tappet covers on the Bling machine have been off and on more times than a Whore's knickers when the 6th Fleet has docked!.
Most of you are also probably aware that threaded holes in anything aluminium need to be treated like High school virgins i.e CAREFULLY well what can I say the Bling Meister who has more kit than is seen at a Snap On Convention doesn't need to be told this.....
Well on replacing the right hand cover when I tightened on of the bolts I detected a definate loosness somewhat like Wh..e after the 6th fleet I should imagine, after trying to convince Myself that it was all in My imagination and trying blame the Rude whiskey's I am afraid to say the thread WAS streached (read over tightened you d..s)
I must say I pretended that it would be fine and convinced Myself that it would be fine.....
But Oh! no Mr Compulsive obsessive couldn't leave it like that, a phone call to Lyndhurst and a word with Mr Jones ( I can still hear the shrieks of laughter BM You did what??) Yeah!Yeah! rub it in, I got told put in a Heli-coil but go carefully!!! and also if I had fitted one before, Bah!humbug this is Mr Caterpillar you are talking to here repairer of all thing mechanical, Have I ever fitted a heli-coil before I ask you!!!
Anyway helicoil fitted Mr Bright spark after a few rude whiskeys decides to check that all is well and run the tappet bolt through to check the thread and.... guess what D......ie forgets that without the tappet cover in place with the rubber seal the thread on the bolt goes far further than when the tappet cover is on, result one stuck bolt ( There was another technical reason which has to do with Helicoils as to why it got stuck, but lets just leave it at that)
To make matters worse when I tied the brute force approach the bolt broke!!! result one broken bolt in the aluminium stud.
Another phone call to Mr Jones this time howling rip roaring laughter, phone dropped and I can hear a body rolling around on the floor, after sanity reigned, he promises to send the Bakkie and trailer around to My house the next day.
At Lyndhurst whole head off, send to engineering works, remove said offending bolt and helicoil, weld drill and re-tap
refit.
Me Um! so whats this going to cost, Mr Jones with glee in his eyes Oh! not too much.
Bill repair to Cyl head R175
Labour to strip and re-fit R2000
Cost to dented pride and Ego... Priceless.
So just for you here it is now even more people can see what a D...s I made of Myself!! :biggrin:
Right so I have now have officially made a complete D...s of myself twice in public in the last couple of weeks!!
As you all know by now one of the services I offer is the repair of tappet covers on the beemers, now you also probably know that the tappet covers on the Bling machine have been off and on more times than a Whore's knickers when the 6th Fleet has docked!.
Most of you are also probably aware that threaded holes in anything aluminium need to be treated like High school virgins i.e CAREFULLY well what can I say the Bling Meister who has more kit than is seen at a Snap On Convention doesn't need to be told this.....
Well on replacing the right hand cover when I tightened on of the bolts I detected a definate loosness somewhat like Wh..e after the 6th fleet I should imagine, after trying to convince Myself that it was all in My imagination and trying blame the Rude whiskey's I am afraid to say the thread WAS streached (read over tightened you d..s)
I must say I pretended that it would be fine and convinced Myself that it would be fine.....
But Oh! no Mr Compulsive obsessive couldn't leave it like that, a phone call to Lyndhurst and a word with Mr Jones ( I can still hear the shrieks of laughter BM You did what??) Yeah!Yeah! rub it in, I got told put in a Heli-coil but go carefully!!! and also if I had fitted one before, Bah!humbug this is Mr Caterpillar you are talking to here repairer of all thing mechanical, Have I ever fitted a heli-coil before I ask you!!!
Anyway helicoil fitted Mr Bright spark after a few rude whiskeys decides to check that all is well and run the tappet bolt through to check the thread and.... guess what D......ie forgets that without the tappet cover in place with the rubber seal the thread on the bolt goes far further than when the tappet cover is on, result one stuck bolt ( There was another technical reason which has to do with Helicoils as to why it got stuck, but lets just leave it at that)
To make matters worse when I tied the brute force approach the bolt broke!!! result one broken bolt in the aluminium stud.
Another phone call to Mr Jones this time howling rip roaring laughter, phone dropped and I can hear a body rolling around on the floor, after sanity reigned, he promises to send the Bakkie and trailer around to My house the next day.
At Lyndhurst whole head off, send to engineering works, remove said offending bolt and helicoil, weld drill and re-tap
refit.
Me Um! so whats this going to cost, Mr Jones with glee in his eyes Oh! not too much.
Bill repair to Cyl head R175
Labour to strip and re-fit R2000
Cost to dented pride and Ego... Priceless.
